Build Date: Fri Jul 19 17:40:06 2024 UTC

if you post one more fucking "airliner-shot-down-by-missle" story, I'll tie you up in a device like Paul Snider tied Dorothy Stratten into, grease you up, and personally wheel you into the Lone Star on a beer bust night.
-- Flesh

Counterfeit Counter-Espionage!

by El Destino

2000-05-25 22:43:37

"My name is Banks. Agent Banks.

"My body is only six inches wide, but my eerie pupil-less blue eyes were paid for by your tax dollars..."

"When the U.S. Bureau of Engraving and Printing needed a Shockwave cartoon character to explain their re-designed dollar bills, they called in me! 'Agent Banks!' See me rock my head back and forth! Thrill as I extend my arm repeatedly for no apparent reason! Watch me slide from one side of your screen to the other!

I'm the product of many lonely nights for web designers at the government's hip new web site at Unfortunately, all the best ideas were already taken by the U.S. Mint for those funky gold dollar ads. But I'm here -- to make learning about the new currency fun!

Did you know that ink jet printers, color copiers, and scanners are just a few of the tools criminals use to create bogus bills?! I'm not making this up! But ya know, money is more than just green and white slips of paper. It's the government-issued tokens denoting monetary units exchangeable for -- hey! Pay attention!

You can test your currency knowledge in my "Fun and Games" section! See me bounce on a trampoline in a yellow beanie cap with a dollar sign on it! Take multiple choice quizzes to browbeat government talking points into your...

Aw, who am I kidding? I'm probably the lamest informational government-sponsored Shockwave animation around.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

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