ATI! Because it kind of rocks.

     
 

Darwin award missed by THAT much...
2006-09-06 12:15:08


Goodbye Goodbye Goodbye!
 
Is that my blood?
-- P a u l

 

Stupid fuck extraordinaire, Steve Irwin, has fucked with his last wild animal. An asshole even by Australian standards, Irwin fucked around with the wrong stingray and took a poisoned barb directly in the heart.

Irwin's lasting contribution to conservation ranks with that of the roadrunner.

Just as even the most implacable hater of coyotes couldn't help but root for the coyote to prevail, even the most hardened herpetophobe watching Irwin torment yet another hapless victim found himself hoping that just this once the crocodile or cobra would get a piece of the ex-wanker, eliciting the croak of a mercifully final death-crikey.

Irwin's lasting contribution to science is a tentative answer to the age-old question "just precisely how stupid is too stupid to live?"

Experts contend that at the end of every episode, the failure of this menace to wildlife to pay the ultimate price for his reckless stupidity produced a clearly audible sigh from Darwin's ghost. Sadly, his lamentable genetic legacy was passed on to progeny before his stupidity caught up with him. So, for those keeping score, that's Irwin 0;Stingray 1; Darwin's score disallowed on a technicality.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

zuul@pigdog.org


comments powered by Disqus
 
     

 

C L A S S I C   P I G D O G

Please Continue...
by Baron Earl

Skunk School -- Learn Why Not To Keep Skunks As Pets
by El Snatcher & Ms. BunnyPenny

Vacationing from Somnambulant Narrow Realities
by Negative Nancy

GNUisance
by El Snatcher, Mr. Bad

05-25

The Compulsive Splicer

Space aliens are breeding with humans, says Oxford instructor

05-17

Master Squid

Man killed by crossbow in Germany led 'medieval cult'

05-17

El Destino

Crazy bitcoin-trading "seasteader" forced to run by the Thai government

03-30

Flesh

Alex Jones Admits To Being Psychotic.

03-30

Flesh

Alex Jones Throws Temper Tantrum After Being Laughed At.

03-30

Flesh

So what's the time? It's time to get ill! Alex Jones Smokes Some Kind. Gets Really Paranoid

03-23

El Destino

The Las Vegas Strip now has robot bartenders

03-06

Poindexter Fortran

University of California special collections: now with more Hunter S. Thompson

02-15

Baron Earl

Amazing hand-stitched scenes from DUNE

01-17

Baron Earl

Contributions to Top Dark Money Spenders

More Quickies...