Fnord-O-Rama!
1999-09-23 16:40:41
Bombs! Guns! Dope! Coke! Spiders! Lizards! Alligators! Scorpions! A Man That Lives With His Mom! A Garage Full of Lawn Mowers! Oh the horror! Oh the humanity!
OK, so the guy was actually growing pot in his back yard, and the cops did find coke on a mirror, but the rest is just a fnord-fest. The "bombs" turned out to be some sort of flare things made outta model-rocket parts. The "zoo of dangerous animals" that one cop claims was guarding the drugs and stolen goods turns out to be an alligator (I'm guessing about a 10 inch baby?), geckos, two scorpions and a tarantula (which the article mentions "are venomous").
Uh, scorpions and tarantulas are about as poisonous as bees, OK, maybe wasps... I don't even know what to say about the concept of attack geckos.

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