Build Date: Mon Mar 9 17:50:08 2026 UTC
If you think fertilized eggs are people but refugee kids aren't, you're going to have to stop pretending your concerns are religious.
-- LOLGOP
Thus Spake Zarathustra!
2000-01-23 16:33:47
Check it out! The definitive Web site for traditional Zoroastrianists! With lots of crazy Zoroastrian parables and long treatises on various aspects of Zoroastrianism! Can you BEAT THAT, motherfucker? I thought not.
Zoroastrianism is TOTALLY COOL. OK, actually, I don't know SHIT about Zoroastrianism, but, HEY, I still think it's cool. And fundamentalist "traditional" Zoroastrianism is by any account several points cooler.
I don't usually make a point of picking on persons of faith, and Zoroastrians aren't going to be the first. Zoroastrianism is bitchen, anyways! They have big FIRE ceremonies, for one thing. AND they have a big Persian guy with a GIGANTIC BEARD as their big leader d00d. That's cool, too! He has a great hat! And no one can deny that they have the best soundtrack of any religion ever! Dun... dun... dun... DUN-DUN! It puts the fear of Ahura-Mazda in your BONES, man.
If you can find a better Web site for TRADITIONAL ZOROASTRIANISM than this one, I will eat my cyberbilly hat, goggles and all. And don't give me www.zoroaster.com, because that's just a punk-ass parked domain. Who needs it! That's what I say to zoroaster.com. Screw that stuff.
Zoroastrianism may be the last religion in the dictionary, but they're FIRST with me! Go check out this crazy TRADITIONAL ZOROASTRIANISM site right now! And tell 'em Mr. Bad sent you! They'll LOVE THAT.
T O P S T O R I E S
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Songs Of Love And Special Things
Well, dear reader, there's no denying it: Spring has sprung. The air is pungent with the fertile aroma of Romance. And you know what goes with Romance, don't you? That's right, Lover, porn. And not just any porn, but the kind you can sing along to. (More...)
Vacationing from Somnambulant Narrow Realities
So about six months ago, I was chilling in Chang Mai, Thailand with ICBINJ, perursing the Bangkok Times over my banana pancake and Big Chang breakfast when I spotted this article reprinted from the LA Times. It was about some kooks from California (where else?) who were claiming to have been to the front lines in Afgahnistan in mid-December and had recorded the whole feat on their website. "Holy Fuck!" I thought, "Now That's web journalism. Who are these guys!?" (More...)
This week: another fine spocktail from the beverage researchers at SMRL! Drink it in peace, because WE DID THE RESEARCH! (More...)
Experimenter is a film released in 2015 starring Peter Sarsgaard. It tells the story of Dr. Stanley Milgram's life, including the infamous Milgram electric shock experiment, tests on crowds, and his work developing a theory on the mechanics of social networks. It currently streams on Netflix. (More...)
It’s election night. My wife and I are holed-up in this hotel that my political party has rented out for the evening. Outside, people are being violently beaten for whom they voted for. Is this South Africa? Perhaps we’re in Haiti or some Southern state during the 60’s. Of all the places where this sort of thing happens, it’s mind-boggling that we are in Portland, Maine. (More...)
Clowns Take on God in Mysterious Annual Ceremony
Last Sunday's (the 6th) Grimaldi Service at a small church in East London was a red-letter day for clowns worldwide. About a hundred old-school red-nosed clowns made the sombre trip to darkest Dalston to pay their respects to clowns who died in the last year and to thank God for the gift of laughter in a bizarre ceremony presided over by the eccentric Reverend Clown Roly, resplendent in a garish red lumberjack shirt with oversized gold lapels. (More...)
