I dunno. I just really don't know. It seems to me that with all the resources we've got on this big ol' World Wide Web, all the talent and creativity we have at our disposal, that someone, somewhere, could make a Jake Busey Fan Page that's worth a goddamn. But I guess that's not the case.

There's a link at the bottom of this page, and you can see Trav's home page, The World's Only Jake Busey Fan Site. Now, Trav's got a lot of enthusiasm, but he doesn't have a lot worth saying. And that's a crying shame.

I for one think this is a sad state of affairs. I mean, there's gotta be about 7 million Leonardo DiCaprio fan sites out there, and not a Jake Busey fan site worth crap.

OK, I've got an idea. Here's what you can do to help. We need to start a letter-writing campaign. I have compiled a list of the email addresses of a whole bunch of people who have Leonardo DiCaprio fan sites. Everyone who reads this needs to send them email to the effect of:

"Dear Webmaster: Did you know that while there are several thousand Leonardo DiCaprio fan sites, there aren't any Jake Busey fan sites worth a goddamn? Doesn't that kind of bother you? Maybe you should take some of your enthusiasm for Leonardo DiCaprio and make a Jake Busey fan site instead. Leonardo DiCaprio is great and all, but it's just a crying shame there's not a Jake Busey site out there. Signed, A Concerned Citizen."

Hell, you could even cut and paste that text. Go ahead. What the hell.

OK, here's some addresses:

illicitly_leo@hotmail.com (Illicitly DiCaprio Page)

[censored] (www.dicaprio.com)

editor@cricketmedia.com (Totally DiCapitated LITERARY MAGAZINE)

so_charming@hotmail.com (Leo King of My Heart Page)

NaomiG_98@yahoo.com (Leo's Loft)

pene@tig.com.au (The Leo Files)

rosiedog@geocities.com (Abbi and Sarah's Leonardo DiCaprio Page)

rsalkow@execpc.com (Katie's DiCaprio Fan Page)

the_leo_lair@hotmail.com (The Leo Lair)

janine@earthling.net (Leonardo DiCaprio World)

cappucino2525@hotmail.com (My Dear Mr. DiCaprio I Presume...)

favorite82@geocities.com (My Favorite Hunk)

If we all do it, at least one or two of these people is gonna switch. I'm telling you, it's gonna happen. You have to believe.

Anyways, send your letters, and check out Trav's page, too. Give him props because at least he's out there keepin' it real.

Check it out yourself

paco@pigdog.org