Build Date: Wed May 21 12:40:36 2025 UTC
I quit drinking, and then I lost my car, and my house, my girlfriend and my job and my self respect. Now I'm homeless, unemployed, riding public transpo, broke, unloved and suicidally depressed, but you know what? today I don't have to drink.
-- Splicer
Boring Gore Nearly Talks Boy to Death
2000-10-13 16:58:23
Earlier today, during a stump speak in Grand Rapids, Iowa, Al Gore nearly talked a 10 year boy, Blake Riffel, to death.
The boy standing behind Gore clearly couldn't believe that Al Bore was actually one of the two drones running that will become the most powerful man on the planet next January. Disturbed by this revelation and the droning of the drone, the Blake fell into a coma and passed out behind the Vice President.
This is clearly the tip of the iceberg. Whichever of these two dunderhead becomes President, one thing is certain... there will be more Blake Riffel's. I say stop the INSANITY and ... and... and... ... ... fuck... I don't have an "and". Shit, we're screwed and the next four years is gonna suck.
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
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Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
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Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
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Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
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Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
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The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
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C L A S S I C P I G D O G
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The Ancient and Correct Sake Ceremony
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Three Days and 25 Spocktails: A Cautionary Tale
Johnnie Royale picked me up from the dental surgery. I felt warm, safe, cradled in the anathesia's loving embrace. The pharmacy downstairs gave me a bottle of Vicodin and a few instructions: take it with food, don't mix with alcohol, don't operate heavy machinery. I put it in my pocket and we left. "Do you want to go home, or do you want to go to a bar?" asked Johnnie. (More...)
The Liquidation of Hobo Junction
Albany, CA's homeless hooverville by the Bay, "Hobo Junction," is going to be torn down by The Man. Entrances are already being blocked off, and it's now difficult and dangerous to get there. Worse, these obstacles are making it hard to get to the nearby HORSE TRACK on foot. Local historian, Pao Tzu, has an overview of situation. (More...)
