Build Date: Wed Nov 26 02:30:12 2025 UTC
It's funny and Spockish, and it would make all the robots break when they see it! And then you would be king and you could make Harry Mudd go to hell.
-- ESP
Government Shutdown as Rabid Bats Swarm Northern Mexico
1999-06-07 21:24:10
AUGH! Rabid bats are swarming over the villages and towns of Northern Mexico, carrying away infants in their dripping septic jaws!
The Mexican news agency UPI reports that LOTS of people have been attacked by these flying rodents of the night! The bastardly mammals -- no better than squirrels, in this reporter's opinion -- have SHUT DOWN the bustling economy of Northern Mexico, turning it into an arid wasteland of BAT FEAR!
The horrendous androphagic bats thrive in the SWELTERING HEAT! It causes their bacterial BRAIN infections to fester and DRIVE THEM MAD with HATE! It does not take a BAT BIOLOGIST to know that humans will be the losers in this DIABOLICAL EQUATION.
The crazed flesh-eating bat situation is so horrific that the Mexican government has SEALED OFF THE AREA. But will that be enough? Can the HOT RABID BATS of MEXICO be stopped? Or is this a potential KILLER BEE situation requiring the FULL FORCE OF THE UNITED STATES MILITARY to stave off MEXICAN BLOODBAT BLITZKRIEGS throughout the American Southwest?!?!
Only time will tell. Keep your eye on this bat thing, folks.
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