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They Can Have My Chicken Strip When They Pry It From My Cold, Dead Fingers

by Baron Earl

2001-02-12 22:48:54

Teachers don't want kids in school with guns? OK. Teachers don't want violent kids in schools? OK. Teachers don't want kids who play with their food in a threatening way in school... what? I've heard of logical slippery slopes before, but this is NUTS.

In Arkansas an eight-year-old first-grade boy was suspended from school for playing with his food in a threatening manner.

Specifically, he pointed a chicken finger, aka a "chicken strip," at a teacher and uttered the menacing words "Pow, pow, pow."

Dan Sullivan, the school principal, was quoted saying "People saw real threats to the safety and security of their students."

Apparently the school has zero-tolerance policy against weapons, and pointing a chicken strip at a teacher violates that policy.

Although I was as surprised as anyone to learn that they actually DO HAVE SCHOOLS in Arkansas, apparently you are not actually required to graduate from one in order to become a teacher or a principal there.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

aznar@pigdog.org

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