Build Date: Wed Apr 15 06:20:08 2026 UTC
Do you ever just punch domain names into Netscape and hope something comes up?
-- Mr. Bad
Shrub's Axis of Stupidity
2002-03-17 15:02:43
Our Commander in Chief recently named an "Axis of Evil." But the real danger is his own Axis of Stupidity.
Most Americans realize that the present occupant of the White House wasn't really, you know, popularly elected, but jimmied his way into the mansion by virtue of family connections (Daddy's friends plus a very helpful brother who just happened to be Florida's Governer), lots of Enron political slush-money that earlier bought the Shrub keys to the Texas Governer's mansion, topped off by an uncharacteristically counter States-Rights decision by a supposedly conservative Supreme Court. But we can handle it, since such skullduggery has been just under the surface in US politics for awhile now. The CIA likely shot John Kennedy to keep him from shutting down the heroin cashflow in Southeast Asia. Nixon got caught targeting a domestic "enemies list" and sending burglars into the Democratic National Committee. Reagan's spear-chuckers devised a very creative double-Faustian bargain with "arms for hostages" to ensure Carter's defeat by simultaneously pandering to Iran's ruling assholes and propping up the CIA sponsored murderous military in Nicaragua. It's clear that big money buys national politics and our national politicians are all just whores to Big Oil and Hollywood. What else is new?
Well, what's new is that we've got a dummy in the White House, Enron buddies in Cabinet and other senior positions, a fundamentalist Attorney General, a media-whore FCC Chairman, and a Big-5 lobbyist SEC Chairman. We also have a few real problems, like a new forever War On Terrorism, an old forever War On Drugs, budget surpluses that magically reversed into inflationary budget deficits, a military spending spree that dwarfs Star Wars, and by-the-way, a recession with millions of people out of work, extensions to unemployment benefits (like that really helps), and rampant stupidity.
One doesn't know which is more alarming, Dubya's stupidity or his corporate handlers led by Dick Cheney. After all, the country did survive Gerald Ford's administration. But GW just seems to be piling dumb on dumber as he spends more of his time mismanaging our affairs. He started by pissing off 90% of the world by rejecting US commitments to resolving global warming issues. Then he declares an open-ended war on terrorists (who by definition can't be confronted easily), cripples all the airlines - a major factor in the economy - with a bunch of stupid "security" rules that dissuade travelers without doing anything really more secure, effectively tramples all over Constitutional Rights, forgives the most virulent monopoly threatening technology competition in this next century, pushes a hopeless missile defense boondoggle, names an Axis of Evil gratuitously, gives the finger to Russia, Iran, and China with a leaked nuclear retargeting study, stirs the pot in the Middle East further without any real plan, and talks tough about Saddam Hussein without means to back it up. All taken together, this has to qualify as genius level fucking-up on a global scale. Dubya and friends must work at this.
Bush lite, Cheney, Ashcroft, White, Powell Jr., and Wolfowitz, et al . . . a clear and present danger, an Axis of Stupidity. I for one simply hope we will live long enough to vote all these lame and dangerous bastardos emphatically out of power.

T O P S T O R I E S
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
The Deep Dark Underbelly of the Star Wars Myth, or Ramayana Remembered
It's a fact: Star Wars is a blatant plagiarism of an ancient Asian legend, and the long lines of devout Star Wars freaks are really unscrupulous Asian copyright busters. From Indonesia to Thailand to Nepal, videos are available for sale or rent before they're even released in the US and UK due to this nerdy camcorder-clutching bunch. (More...)
Owner of 6 Medical Marijuana Dispensaries Arrested
Reefer madness or a government fabrication? (More...)
Canadians Not So Different After All
Nobody wants to be prejudiced. But sometimes you can be biased and not even realize it. I think many Americans are biased in this way against Canadians. I never really stopped to think about it, but I myself used to be this way. I guess I thought that Canadians were "stuck-up" — you know, smarter and better cultured than us. But then I got educated about Canadia. (More...)
The Walken / Country Bear Conspiracy
As has been recently reported in the PDJ, Christopher Walken, evil s00per villain extraordinaire, will be appearing next month in Disney's newest release, The Country Bear Movie. Always playing some wicked and very disturbed badass in movies like Sleepy Hollow, Illuminata, The Prophecy I, II, III, Pulp Fiction, Batman Returns, The Milagro Beanfield War, A View to a Kill, The Dogs of War, Heaven's Gate, and The Deer Hunter, Walken is unsuprisingly a big favorite in the PDJ news room. (More...)
All this talk about death, wakes and Moloch recently has, frankly, got me a little worried. What if I'm next to go? I could slip on a wet banana peel and slam my head against an enormous brass statue at almost any time. I'm not planning well enough for this sort of thing. Who will talk for me when this terrible day comes? (More...)
Report from Spiritual Machines
Arkuat gives you the inside scoop on the "Spiritual Machines" panel and conclave. Wacky excitement ensues! (More...)