Build Date: Sun Jan 25 19:20:13 2026 UTC
I wish I had a chicken here right now so I could pull the head off as an object lesson to his evil little chicken friends. Fuckers.
-- Lenny the Nice
Solar-powered Corpse Cooker
2001-08-04 09:35:47
"When my grandmother died we took her to the Towers Of Silence. Four men carried the body into one of the towers. I heard the harsh cry of the vultures and knew that in a matter of minutes they would strip the flesh from the bones. The skeleton would then lie under the fierce glare of the tropical sun until it calcified, after which the powdery remains would be cast into a central well and seep into the Earth. I wasn't revolted because we have been doing it for centuries. And my grandmother wanted it this way." -- Homi Dastur, deputy executive secretary of the Hindu Bharatiya Vidya Bhavan
But what is a Zoroastrian to do when there are too many corpses and not enough vultures to eat them?
(A) Start a vulture-breeding program.
(B) Come up with a vaccine to cure dying vultures.
(C) Use solar-power to heat up corpses to increase the speed of decomposition.
(D) All of the Above.

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