Build Date: Fri Feb 13 01:10:17 2026 UTC
People who read PDJ should expect to be lied to. Dangerous, irresponsible
lies at that. Fuck the rules.
-- Lenny Tuberose
What's in, What's out - Version 2001
2001-01-21 21:30:22
So yesterday George "Dubbya" Bush, took the oath of office and became the 43th President of the United States of America. Naturally a new administration in Washington means that there will be a lot of changes and so Pigdog is here to tell you what fads faded into the past with the retirement of Bill Clinton and what are now the hottest trends in the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave.
| OUT | IN |
| Lyin' | Inability to count |
| Aggressive, no nonsense wife | Cookie baking wife |
| Oval Office sex | No sex, period |
| Right wing Clinton bashing | Left wing whining |
| Corporate greed | Extreme corporate greed |
| What's left of the Bill of Rights | Corporate Rights |
| Laughable National Energy Policy | Energy Policy??? We don't need no stinkin' Energy Policy! What we need are more oil wells |
| Homely daughters | Cuter daughters, but not as fine as Gore's |
| Workaholic President | Best naps since the Reagan era |
| Problems understanding what the word "is" means | Problems understanding what any words mean |
| Arkansas Meth | Texas Coke |
| Don't ask, Don't Tell | Homophobia... but it's OK, because the Bible says so |
| Legal Abortion | Death penalty for abortionists |
| Debt reduction | Tax cuts for the wealthy |
| Balanced Supreme Court | Radical right court that attempts to return the U.S. to the 18th century |
| Governor Death | President Death |
| Boring, banal VP | VP that runs the country |
| No more welfare | Much more corporate welfare |
| Lip service about helping the poor | Government assistance to the wealthy too so that the top 1% can go from owning 80% of the wealth to 99% |
| Ranting right wing talk show hosts | Left wing protest marches ending in riots |
| East Coast liberal intellectuals | Texas rednecks |
| Gun control | Mandatory gun ownership |
| God every Sunday | Jesus, Jesus, Jesus and more Jesus every damn day of the week |
| Horrible, misguided and unwinable War on Drugs | Horrible, misguided and unwinable War on Drugs minus any sort of treatment programs |
| Sophisticated attempts to disenfranchise unliked minorities | Jailing of all minorities as it was gonna happen anyway and this will save a lot of time and effort on trials and evidence fabrication |
| A government that pretended to care | HAHAHAHAHA |
T O P S T O R I E S
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Skunk School -- Learn Why Not To Keep Skunks As Pets
There is an alarming trend in pet purchasing habits this fall. People inspired by the WWII film, "Life is Beautiful" -- the one with that annoying Italian guy -- are buying descented skunks by the millions. (More...)
It's winter in Idaho, and Boise personality "Lego-Man" reports on how he celebrated Thanksgiving. "I fed my wife, mother and sister wine slurpies!" (More...)
Vacationing from Somnambulant Narrow Realities
So about six months ago, I was chilling in Chang Mai, Thailand with ICBINJ, perursing the Bangkok Times over my banana pancake and Big Chang breakfast when I spotted this article reprinted from the LA Times. It was about some kooks from California (where else?) who were claiming to have been to the front lines in Afgahnistan in mid-December and had recorded the whole feat on their website. "Holy Fuck!" I thought, "Now That's web journalism. Who are these guys!?" (More...)
The quest for knowledge never ends at the super top secret Spock Mountain Laboratory, although it is frequently interrupted by beverage breaks. Recently, a team of crack ethnomixologists returned from a dangerous expedition to the frozen expanse of Canada with the much sought recipe for a Spocktail that is destined to replace blunt force head trauma as the major cause of brain damage in the civilized world. (More...)
Paranoid Strippers & Psychotic Crack Dealers (Tales of Christmas Eve)
Christmas day, for the last 17 or so years has bored me. I find that the real fun and excitement always takes place on Christmas Eve. Every other year, it's the excitement of the metaphorical hunt instead of the kill. Otherwise, it's just plain bad craziness. (More...)
Last week I had eye surgery and it was certainly one of the least enjoyable episodes of my life. Eye Surgeons like their patients to be conscious enough so that they can move their eyes to the proper position during surgery. (More...)
