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Cut 'n Paste
2002-09-26 18:23:36

Art Fux
I hear that Boris is cracking down on Russian hillbilly moonshine...
-- Ratsnatcher


I don't know what it is about the Germans and their fixation on creating a master race, but yet another German scientist wants to create a new, improved human being. Germans have tried this before, and the results were Not Good. At least the human beings this German scientist is working on are dead before he starts cutting them up.

Some call him an artist, some call him a sick freak, but Gunter von Hagens will not only cut up dead bodies and paste them back together in a superior, master-race-like way, but the whole process will be recorded and broadcast on British television.

"They will pave the way for a future life with a more healthy, capable and longer lasting body," von Hagens said in a statement released by the television company involved. Von Hagens said a superior human being would have features such as spare vital organs and hyper-flexible joints.

At least 20 people in Britain have agreed to donate their bodies to von Hagens' institute so that their carcasses may be mutilated for the public's amusement. I hope their families have a sense of humor when they see a departed loved one's face with penis for a nose.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.


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