Wow! I've been all around this great big world, and I've seen all
kinds of girls. But that's neither here nor there. What's up
with SURVEILLANCE CAMERAS, man?
So, there are like KAJILLIONS of cameras all over this country, all over every
city. Go out to the street or to a square or park -- and look around. There's
probably 2 or 3 on you right now. Up in the corners of buildings, on the edges
of ATMs. In the little nook behind the bus driver's seat. All over the subway or
MUNI station. In your work, at schools, in the mall. LOTS OF FUCKING CAMERAS.
Now, most of these are watched by bored and fat security guards, although I once
played this pr0n CD-ROM game where there was this hot, sexy security guard who
would use the surveillance cameras to watch folks get freaky. Like, if you
picked the right scenes to make her excited, she would take off more of her
clothes. Or something like that. But in general, it's bored and fat security
guards, with like a microscopic smattering of horny porn stars.
The weird thing about the Web is that, with Web cams, we're becoming a NATION of
bored, fat security guards, watching other bored fat security guards watch each other
on the Web. It's creepy, man. Is this the fantasy future we wanted to make
happen? What happened to the laser pistols and the big genetically-altered
elephant cyber-beasts? What's with being the WALGREEN'S RENT-A-COP? I missed
that issue of Amazing Tales, I guess.
Anyways, these folks in New York City decided that it's just a little weird to
be on the OTHER side of the camera. Being watch, being photographed, being
recorded. All the fucking time, like when you scratch your ass on the subway
platform when you think nobody's looking. Because SOMEBODY'S LOOKING! So they
decided that if they were going to be on TV all the time, they better start
And they founded the Surveillance Camera Players (note that it's not "security
camera" -- I like that. Use your language well, folks). They do PLAYS in front
of the cameras, like Pere
Ubu and 1984.
They do all kinds of crazy shit! It's great! They even do stuff for Web cams on Times Square and
OK, but, all well and good. Check out the SCP Web site, and if you live in New
York City, go check out their walking tours, pointing out the security cams and
possibly doing some FUN CRAZYNESS. Beaujolais to the SCP!