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I hate to be a one issue voter, but the first candidate that promises public booze fountains gets my vote.
-- Johnnie Royale
Damn Ay-leens
Learn about Ay-leens before they kidnap you and eat your brain.
Pigdog Journal Articles
2023-08-11
Six cattle died mysteriously in Texas, with their tongues removed, the hide around one side of their mouths gone and no blood spilled. In two cases, the animals' genitalia and anuses had been removed with a circular cut that the sheriff's office said had been made with the "same precision as the cuts noted around the jaw lines of each cow." This is obviously the work of aliens from another planet.
2011-03-02
The damn ay-leens are at it again, using their mind-rays to cause a cameraman to forget everything he knows about operating a video camera -- how to focus, how to hold the camera steady, how to frame his subject.
2002-08-20
Chupacabra may have been the unexplained demonic alien creature for the 90s, but I was starting to think the whole thing had gotten a little old. The recent appearance of the Muhnochwa or "face-scratching creature" in Uttar Pradesh, India, is like a breath of fresh air on the stagnant cryptozoological scene.
2002-08-15
Known throughout Central and South America as the "Chupacabra", they suck the blood from living goats, draining them dry and leaving them dead. Times are hard everywhere, and the downturn in the Argentine economy left one goatsucker with no choice but to apply for unemployment benefits.
2001-03-10
"Back in those glory days, I was very uncomfortable when they asked us to say things we didn't want to say and deny other things. Some people asked, you know, were you alone out there? We never gave the real answer, and yet we see things out there, strange things, but we know what we saw out there. And we couldn't really say anything. The bosses were really afraid of this, they were afraid of the War of the Worlds type stuff, and about panic in the streets. So, we had to keep quiet. And now we only see these things in our nightmares or maybe in the movies, and some of them are pretty close to being the truth." - Senator John Glenn on NBC Tuesday, March 6, 2001.
2000-07-28
You know the aliens are coming to get you, and you want to know what you can do to stop them? Here's a website that explains a method to defeat alien abductions that's EVEN MORE EFFECTIVE than wrapping your head in aluminum foil.
2000-03-10
A 37-year-old Iowan man was transported 180 miles by aliens who flung him threw a house window and then abandoned him, bleeding and confused, to be found by local police. I'm guessing they were using some sort of space/time continuum warping technology, but I'm still waiting for confirmation. The police, in typical non-believer fashion, claim the man was high on methamphetamines and charged him with second-degree burglary.
2000-01-12
The American Astronomical Society, which I've never heard of but it sounds like an impressive name, reported HUGE MONSTER ALIENS located on other stars. Well, um, that is, the Infrared Space Observatory showed that it's pretty easy for organic molecules to form around other stars.
2000-01-08
Ay-leens aren't satisfied anymore with the occasional documentary on the Discovery Channel or The Learning Channel, now they want their own channel -- and they're getting it. Behold! EnigmaTV is born!
1999-12-10
A strange object from outer space hurtled into a reservoir in Guyra, Australia, and left a 40-centimeter-diameter tunnel in its wake, prompting scores of superstitious Aussie girly men to run around screaming about "little green men from Mars."
1999-11-05
OK, so no one really thought it was an Alien, they actually thought it was a human foetus. But it was actually an Alien! OK, it was actually a plastic alien toy. But it was really gross!! No one can say it wasn't really gross! It was slimy and metallic and had big ears, it's also expected to be one of this Xmass's biggest hits! And have I mentioned the British are really weird?
1999-06-22
Yeah, there's scads of UFO nuts out there, but this one's a Buddhist priest, and she's got proof! All that and a letter from the Vice-President.
1999-06-22
Flying Saucers! Government Spies! Commie traitors! Giant killer bees! Romance! Adventure! This one's got 'em all, babie.
Okay, I was kidding about the giant killer bees.
1999-06-12
Un-fucking-believable. Not only has the U.S. Gov't allowed those sneaky Chinese to make off with all of our national secrets - but now they are installing an Ay-leen starship in the heart of one of our most high tech and sooper-secret weapons labs.
1999-06-05
As all you E.T. hunters know by now, Seti@home has just started sending chunks of radio telescope space data out to home computers to scan for messages.
1999-05-25
If you too are getting fed up with aliens (especially the Zeta Reticulans, AKA "grays") and all of this kidnapping, perverse reproduction experimentation, mutilation of livestock, and skulking about in flying saucers all the time, now you can fight back with FREE stickers, and other alien resistance stuff!
1999-05-14
The SETI@Home project is finally up and running. You, too, can help LOCATE aliens across the galaxy. Scientists will use this information to destroy their nests with pinpoint accuracy! "I want to kill bugs, sir!"
1998-11-11
There's a new report of a case of a man who was walking his dog in the woods when suddenly an alien popped out, and viciously killed and mutilated his dog. The man became OUTRAGED, and bashed the alien to death with a large tree branch. MIBs were involved... some mysterious deaths... and the alien body got stolen along the way. But not before the man managed to snap some fantastic pictures of the gruesome remains of the alien and its flying saucer!!! He even managed to record its death scream!
1998-11-09
Some quick ALIEN RELATED stories: First, someone keeps pestering our UFO researchers in this country. A UFO researcher named Michael Unam was run off the road by a mysterious truck while collecting data on the Devil's Highway, Route 666.
1998-11-06
You may or may not have heard the buzz about alien signals coming from EQ Pegasi... In a nutshell, an engineer named Paul Dore who bootlegged time on a SETI-style radio telescope discovered special alien signals coming from something in the direction of the star system known as EQ Pegasi.
1998-10-05
Finally, an insurance company is offering an insurance policy against alien abduction.
Offsite links shared by staff writers
2019-02-15
2011-03-24
2011-03-20
2011-03-12
2011-03-07
2011-03-03
2004-09-14
2004-06-20
2003-01-15
A moon soon for everyone.
2002-11-15
2001-07-24
2001-06-27
2001-06-20
2001-06-06
2001-02-13
2000-12-08
2000-09-28
2000-07-17
2000-07-17
2000-06-27
2000-04-11
The Franklin Mint's new 'Roswell Incident Official Eyewitness Sculpture'!!!!!!!!
2000-03-10
NASA scoffs at 'Face on Mars' theory, then helps Disney develop "Mission to Mars," a 120-million-dollar blockbuster about the coverup of a massive humanoid face on the Red Planet.
2000-01-12
Check it out! Everything you never wanted to know about ay-leens! Expecially that they look like My Pretty Pony!
1999-12-09
1999-08-17
X-Files version of history is backed by CIA report-- But how come only British papers are covering the story?
1999-07-15
1999-06-30
United Nuwaubian Nation of Moors Settles Dispute in Georgia
1999-06-08
1999-06-03
1999-05-23
If you're doing SETI@home, you've GOT to join the Pigdog Journal team!
T O P S T O R I E S
America's National Recording Registry Inducts Culturally Significant Artist - Weezer!
America's Library of Congress calls them "defining sounds of history and culture" and "audio treasures worthy of preservation for all time based on their cultural, historical or aesthetic importance in the nation’s recorded sound heritage." Ladies and gentlemen, I give you... Weezer! (More...)
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Ratsnatcher gets HOT HOT HOT in this classic road tale that looks at the steamy underworld of Bay Area Linux advocacy. Loosen your collar for this one! (More...)
What the hell is going on with Sony?
Is anyone else as confused as I am with what's happening with the Sony Playstation network hack? (More...)
The One I Feel Sorry For Is Joses
We've had a lot of Jesus coverage lately here at the PDJ. But let's face it, we're not exactly cutting-edge in this subject area. Jesus has been making headlines for, oh, I guess it's a couple thousand years now. Jesus is a very strong brand. Jesus has a lot of mindshare. (More...)
It was Friday night at the Casa de Baron and everything was in place -- a group of friends had assembled, people were setting things on fire in the backyard, and a Ferry Corsten double-live CD was playing on the stereo. Everything was in place to make further scientific advances in beverage research and leisure technology. (More...)
First in a regular series! The Pigdog Journal Spocktail of the Week features recipes for EXCITING and DELICIOUS potions and tonics for your quaffing pleasure! Gulp down a whole lot TODAY! (More...)
During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)
