Build Date: Tue Oct 28 11:00:30 2025 UTC
All great quotes should end with 'my ass'
-- Bubba Barnett
Power Corrupts
Politics is an ugly business, which is what the Pigdog Journal does best.
Pigdog Journal Articles
2020-05-05
Maryland officials are looking into whether or not a company named after the colloquial term for lighting fart gas on fire is nothing but a scam.
2017-12-15
"I'd finally found Arkuat. Locked in a remote cabin, he was scrawling out his manifesto, where beer bottles shimmered over scattered bits of technology. I'm pretty sure he was building exploding duck decoys..."
2007-03-25
..but if we show you these documents we will be embarrassed when you discover how tiny our weenies are.
2007-01-30
The Department of Information Retrieval meets the Office of the Vice President.
2006-02-23
Secret Service Agents have reportedly stated that Vice President Dick Cheney was drunk at the time he shot Harry Whittington on a hunting trip two weeks ago. The day and a half delay in letting law enforcement onto the ranch to interview the hunting party gave the group plenty of time to sober up.
2003-02-26
So, it's another Virtual March on Something -- this time on Washington, what with the INCIPIENT BLOODBATH coming any day now. The folks at Win Without War are organizing a big-ass mass-calling-mailing-faxing dealy, and you should be part of it, if only to cause mayhem and get people pissed off at you.
2003-01-17
As the Bush Administration continues to bang the drums of war while moving hundreds of thousand of troops to the Middle East, millions of Americans are questioning why. Why are we going to war with Iraq? Is it because of oil? Is it because of terrorism? Is it because of weapons of mass destruction? Is it because Saddam is an evil-doer? Does he smell bad? Is it because he embarrassed the Bush the First? Just what’s the beef, dude?
2003-01-13
With an estimated 35 Billion (that's a illion with a "B") budget deficit looming over the state of California, Gov. Gray Davis has been forced to slash just about every conceivable program in existence to meet the state’s constitutionally mandated balanced budget requirement. Every program regardless of merit, from schools, to roads, to agricultural advertising campaigns in Central Africa will share the pain. Every program that is, except the Department of Corrections.
2002-11-01
In a crushing blow to the freedom of the Internet, ICANN voted Thursday to permanently close elections to its board of directors, thus clearing the way for a small group of individuals to control the entire Internet DNS system with little or no oversight or accountability.
2002-10-03
In an abrupt change from last year's policy, the selected Bush Administration is now considering vaccinating all 280 million Americans against smallpox. Unfortunately, this vaccine is not foolproof and 1 or 2 people per million will die when they are inoculated.
2002-04-23
Over the past few weeks the Israeli press and government spokespeople have repeatedly reminded the world of the parallels between Europe of the 1930s and the modern Western world.
2002-04-19
The Oil Companies attempt to gain corporate control to the ANWR through their private governmental subsidiary located that 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue failed miserably today as the Oil Barons were unable to even muster a simple majority to get the bill on the floor of the Senate.
2002-04-18
Donald Rumsfield has stated that the creation of a military command whose sole mission is to defend American territory will not erode legal limits on using federal troops inside U.S. Borders. Please note that the federal government has an exciting way of using the word "not." Some fun examples: Income tax will be a temporary 2% tax and will *not* remain after it is needed, Social Security Numbers will *not* be used to uniquely identify and track U.S. Citizens, the recently created and disbanded military Department of Lying to the Press will *not* be used to lie to the press, and Census information is confidential and will *not* be handed over to law enforcement agencies for pursuing individuals. Not. I love that word.
2002-04-18
Two terms I've seen recently that have caught my attention: "E-government" and "Identity Theft." It looks like Mark Forman has recently declared that they're considering using Microsoft Passport technology to identify citizens. Why do I find this less than comforting?
2002-04-18
US Attorney General John Ashcroft quest to cripple Oregon's Right to Die Law suffered a serious set back yesterday as a Federal Judge ruled that John Ashcroft and the United States government had no legal reason to prevent doctors in Oregon from distributing drugs that allow terminally ill patients to end their lives.
2002-04-07
Everybody knows that US needs more oil, especially since the Bush Administration simply REFUSES to either mandate improved energy efficiency or more importantly, invest in any sort renewable energy technologies. So sooner or later we are gonna run out of oil and the Bush Administration has a plan to make that date little latter then sooner.
2002-03-17
Ever since the Supreme Court selected our current half-wit President, an ill wind has whipped this noble attempt at self-government, straining our will to persevere and chilling our resolve. Large and very duplicitous forces are conspiring to reduce this nation into a bunch of mindless morons, braindead zombies and marketing whores, incapable of anything more then unquestioning obedience to the dictums of our self-anointed rulers. Don't believe me??? Just look at the Ins and Outs of 2002 and tell me things haven't gone from bleak to horrible lately.
2002-03-17
Our Commander in Chief recently named an "Axis of Evil." But the real danger is his own Axis of Stupidity.
2002-03-02
In a screeching rant that would make any PDJ author proud, Thom Greene of The Register rips into Senator Hollings (D - SC) and his ludicrous "dog and pony" SSSCA hearings Hollings held early this week.
2002-02-27
Our selected President, George W. Bush, announced his plans for welfare defor. . . I mean reform. The cornerstones of this administration's proposed policies, which are to be piled on top of the already horrific Clinton era "reforms", are work and "family formation." In typical "Republican Stormtrooper" fashion and following very nicely in the wake of the "War on Terror", the GOP is once again launching an assault on the poorest of the poor here in the Good Old US of A, all while claiming these draconian measures are for their own good.
2001-11-11
Immediately following the fiasco of the Florida Presidential elections late last year, many of the top news organizations in the lull that occurred between Clinton's dick and the apocalypse of 9-11, funded a study to recount the votes in Florida.
2001-10-31
Now I'll admit to being somewhat hung over after dinner and a lot of drinks at some friends' house last night. But upon viewing the news of the House-passed "economic stimulus package," I had to run to the bathroom for session of deep, passionate, oral worship with my toilet.
2001-10-16
As if things aren't weird enough these days, it seems that the one million dollar audit of the Florida presidential vote that the major news services paid will not be picked up.
2001-08-19
If you've been paying attention for these last few weeks, you know by now that the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA) is a rotten piece of law with over-zealous, unconstitutional restrictions on researchers. Finding a flaw in some company's copy protection software, or discussing that flaw in public, could land you in jail. Not content to wreck the U.S. Constitution, Hollywood's lawyers are now trying to incorporate the DMCA's restrictions into international law by getting its provisions added to the Free Trade Area of the Americas (FTAA) treaty.
2001-08-08
You can't have political dissent without a MIDI playing Devo's "Whip It." See George W. Bush! Dancing! In a tutu! In blue boxer shorts!
2001-08-04
On MONDAY, AUGUST 6TH, Dmitry Sklyarov will be given a bail hearing in a San Jose courtroom. Here's what you can do to help get Dmitry set free...
2001-07-28
Still more protests demanding the release of Dmitry Sklyarov are scheduled for MONDAY, JULY 30TH, around the country. Protests will be happening in San Francisco, Boston, Chicago, Los Angeles, Minneapolis, New York, and Seattle.
2001-07-26
After Monday's demonstrations, Adobe has decided that it no longer wishes to see Dmitry Sklyarov in prison. However, since the charges against him are criminal, not civil, the feds are keeping Dmitry on ice for now.
2001-07-22
Dmitry Sklyarov wrote a clever piece of software which showed that the encryption system used by Adobe software doesn't protect anyone's confidential information. Rather than fix the problem with their software Adobe chose to have Mr. Sklyarov arrested under a provision of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act, which makes it a crime to demonstrate flaws in copyright protection schemes.
2001-06-03
The first impression I got of George W. Bush was that his campaign had tried to reserve every single domain name that might sound like a criticism of him. "bushsucks.com" and whatnot all pointed to his campaign stuff. "Here," said I, "is a man who will eventually become outraged at the press and do something scary like that Comidus guy in Gladiator." Only Gladiator wasn't out yet, I think.
2001-01-24
15,000 angry Americans protested the Bush inaugural cermonies, just in San Francisco, the local paper reported. Six Pigdog Journal staffers were on the scene...
2000-11-21
We all know about soon-to-be-president Bush's coke-snorting, drunken, frat-boy past. But Larry Flynt, a man not afraid to get down into the cesspool and pull up skeletons buried Mafia-style has some new evidence.
2000-11-13
Ya know, one of the great things those on the margins of American politics is that they at least know how to fucking mount a protest. Like those WTO protestors in Seattle. They sure raised a HELL of a ruckus.
2000-11-10
The Rev gives it to you like it is: election day blues.
2000-11-09
So check this out: This feller at CMU has done some VERY SIMPLE statistical analysis on voting patterns in Florida. And apparently either there's a lot of complete nutbag Nazi freaks in Palm Beach County, or something went wrong with that notorious ballot.
2000-11-09
Democrats have secret weapon in race for President.
2000-11-07
The Washington Post today calculated that the amount of the money raised by politicians for the upcoming election will over 3 Billion Dollars. GAG!
2000-10-31
This site is for all you liberals who are just too afraid of Bush to vote for Nader.
2000-10-27
Ok, so this isn't such a big surprise. Moore is like this super big, super old time progressive.
2000-10-26
Ever wonder how your favorite (or least favorite) PDJ editor is gonna vote come this Nov 7th. Well, we'll tell ya.
Offsite links shared by staff writers
2019-01-17
2006-10-01
Stuff like this makes me want to believe in hell, which is not what an atheist likes.
2004-06-20
2003-01-28
This would explain just about everything.
2002-04-11
Now make NO mistake, these caribou will be held accountable (Flash)
2001-07-28
2001-07-28
2001-04-04
2001-02-15
2001-01-24
2000-11-11
2000-11-09
I have to admit that this is particularly satisfying.
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
The Walken / Country Bear Conspiracy
As has been recently reported in the PDJ, Christopher Walken, evil s00per villain extraordinaire, will be appearing next month in Disney's newest release, The Country Bear Movie. Always playing some wicked and very disturbed badass in movies like Sleepy Hollow, Illuminata, The Prophecy I, II, III, Pulp Fiction, Batman Returns, The Milagro Beanfield War, A View to a Kill, The Dogs of War, Heaven's Gate, and The Deer Hunter, Walken is unsuprisingly a big favorite in the PDJ news room. (More...)
I just came across this coolio essay by Pigdog Journal Science Editor binky wedged between two staves in the back corner of the submissions barrel. It's on the origin of the cyberbilly and is definitely de rigeur for any serious student of this fascinating sociological movement. (More...)
40 Acres, a Mule, and a Crummy 90-Second Spot on Weekend Update
Consider the plight of the Black Man. The Black Man on "Saturday Night Live," I mean. Has there ever been a more pathetic thing than a token unredeemed for 28 years? Where is the NAACP when you really need them? (More...)
The IBM Selectric Typewriter Changed My Life
I ran my hands lovingly across her frame, lightly brushing her metallic nipples with my fingers, admiring the shapes and the ways of her curves, the empathetic hum she produced as I had my way with her, the way she made it all seem so effortless and right... she didn't even seem to mind the way I roughly manipulated her knobs and tweaked her casing. She was extremely tolerant, for a typewriter. (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)
Paranoid Strippers & Psychotic Crack Dealers (Tales of Christmas Eve)
Christmas day, for the last 17 or so years has bored me. I find that the real fun and excitement always takes place on Christmas Eve. Every other year, it's the excitement of the metaphorical hunt instead of the kill. Otherwise, it's just plain bad craziness. (More...)
