Build Date: Fri Jun 13 08:52:14 2025 UTC
What have you done for us lately? Face it Chachi, you're a one ladder wonder and you're as stale as a two week old cod fish.
-- Johnnie Royale
Fuck. That Dude is BLUE. Fuck.
2002-11-04 13:51:01
Well, I didn't think we were ever going to get a chance to do another "Y2K Madness" article on Pigdog Journal again, despite the fact that it's one of our finest categories EVER. And yet, this year's election cycle brings us a chance, with the story of the Montana libertarian dude what turned blue because of Y2K.
Dig this story: there's a guy running for US Senate in Montana named Stan Jones. He's a Libertarian, a Montana native, and he's blue. Kinda light-blue-gray, which is an especially weird color to be. He's kind of like Violet Beauregarde after chewing the gum only a couple of seconds. He's not big and round yet, and probably won't be ever.
Mr. Jones turned blue because of Y2K. How cool is that? "Y2K turned me blue." Jones started eating this stuff called "colloidal silver" (I dunno what colloidal means, but it sounds like "colon", so let's just assume he ate the stuff) in 1999 to help his immune system, because he was freaked out that after Y2K nobody was going to have any antibiotics, and he'd get the creeping rot and die. But the problem is that the colloidal (snork) silver gave him a condition called argyria, which makes him all blue and shit.
Anyways, if I was living in Montana, I'd vote for the blue Libertarian. Because he's blue! Fucking cool!
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
A Nobel Prize-Winning Author Describes Liquor
Curled up cozy with a good book? All warm and snuggly and thinking about friends far away? So am I, reading the greatest story by the greatest writer -- when he suddenly starts waxing philosophical about liquor! (More...)
A Blast from the Past! Pao Tzu goes over and under the crucial variables in the production and consumption of Salvia Divinorum. A must read for psychonauts of all stripes. (More...)
Experimenter is a film released in 2015 starring Peter Sarsgaard. It tells the story of Dr. Stanley Milgram's life, including the infamous Milgram electric shock experiment, tests on crowds, and his work developing a theory on the mechanics of social networks. It currently streams on Netflix. (More...)
Suru and I were at the local supermarket recently when we found ourselves in the booze isle, surrounded by rum. Banana rum, coconut rum, vanilla rum, unfiltered run, Jamaican rum, rum, rum, and more rum. We bought one of each and started experimenting... (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)