Build Date: Fri Oct 11 12:30:06 2024 UTC
Rule 1: The world is not fair.
Rule 2: The world does not care.
-- Negative Nancy
Der Bra Ist Krazy!
1999-06-17 14:25:33
Want a new look for your sagging fraulein? No problem! Buy her the stick-on bra, the latest craze in Germany, the country that gave you Col. Klink, Kraftwerk and the Volkswagen Jetta.
Straight from "the hot beaches of Brazil" comes this one-piece wonder, a "bra" that literally sticks to the breasts using the amazing power of suction, and it's "set to drive men on beaches, in public baths and along German lakes crazy."
"The Tropical Bra" is selling like hotcakes in chilly Deutschland; one woman reports she's selling 20 bras a day to horny businessmen and their curious wives. The bra consists of two small pieces of soft tissue which feel like paper, and the bra is held fast to the Teutonic breast by a "skin-friendly adhesive" in the lining. According to news reports, "both patches are attached onto the breasts and the beach fun can begin."
"One bra I even sold to a man!" said shopkeeper Anja Quint. One caveat: the bra is only good for one use, as it is effectively destroyed upon removal.
Those Germans are always thinking up something!
T O P S T O R I E S
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SF Hippies Can't Get Their Act Together
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Mozart to be inducted into the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame
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C L A S S I C P I G D O G
40 Acres, a Mule, and a Crummy 90-Second Spot on Weekend Update
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Skunk School -- Learn Why Not To Keep Skunks As Pets
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Spock Went, Spock Wrote, Spock Kicked Ass
Every Labor Day weekend a large portion of the PDJ staff joins 30,000 other freaks at one of the biggest and strangest art festivals in the world - Burning Man - somewhere on the edge of the Black Rock Desert. Our base of operations is always the ultra swank Spock Mountain Research Labs - the World Leaders in Beverage Science and Leisure Technology. This year, we hauled up our computers, printers and a massive digital duplicator, determined to become Black Rock City's third daily newspaper. Even Spock was surprised by our success - news will never be viewed the same on the playa. Read all seven issues of the 2002 Spock Science Monitor for yourself and see why. (More...)
NASA's Mars missions keep blowing up and crashing, but dammit, when you reach for the stars you have to expect a few minor setbacks. Drink a toast to the men and women of NASA! Toast them with a Lost Probe mixed up with your own two (or three) hands! (More...)
