Build Date: Wed Sep 11 09:00:10 2024 UTC
They wouldn't be heroes if they were infallible, in fact they wouldn't be heroes if they weren't miserable wretched dogs, the pariahs of the earth, besides which the only reason to build up an idol is to tear it down again.
-- Lester Bangs
Safety Standards for Sex Toys
2022-09-02 00:53:12
ISO-3533:2021 is a requirements document from the International Standards Organization that defines the design and safety requirements for products in direct contact with genitalia, the anus, or both.
This is the first time that the ISO has set standards for the quality of sex toys. The document outlines the design requirements for vibrators, dildos, butt plugs, and anything else that is "intended for sexual stimulation or to enhance sexual pleasure." The standard is focused on mechanical toys, it excludes lubes, oils, gels, sprays, and foods.
To meet the standard sex toy manufacturers must:
- Make sure plugs, beads, and things that go into a hole can't stay up there, or could be retrieved by a medical professional if needed.
- Things like chastity cages and cock rings can be removed with pliers or other common household tools in an emergency -- no power tools needed.
- Toys with heating elements must never exceed 118 degrees Fahrenheit. (Hotter temperatures than that that would cause a first-degree burn.)
- Anything going near any holes or genitals should be "smooth and be free from burrs and sharp edges."
- Materials used to construct toys should be "biocompatible" materials.
- Toys need to come with cleaning instructions.
There are also risk assessment protocols that manufacturers must follow if they want to meet these new standards.
So the next time you're shopping for a new toy for that special someone, check and see if it's got an ISO-3533 stamp of approval! You could save yourself a trip to the emergency room.
T O P S T O R I E S
Another Nobel Prize-Winning Author Describes Drunkenness
This book won a Pulitzer Prize. Here's its famous paragraph on getting drunk... (More...)
'Why I'm pretty sure JD Vance had sex with a couch'
True or false? The answers await us in that magical land where all truths are revealed -- the internet. (More...)
In 2010 Dr. Cheng-Huai Ruan discovered a way to cause a patient with an abnormal heartbeat to get back into a normal rhythm by sticking a finger up the patient's ass. (More...)
WKRP in Cincinnati aired from 1978 through 1982. Howard Hesseman played Dr. Johnny Fever, a DJ from Los Angeles who was fired from his previous job for saying the word "booger" on the air. In the show Hesseman would do some dialogue, introduce a song, and start the song. You'd hear a few notes, but never the whole song. (More...)
SF Hippies Can't Get Their Act Together
The annual 420 Hippie Hill event in Golden Gate Park, where large crowds of hippies, wannabe hippies, and hippie poseurs drape themselves in tie dye t-shirts and gather on a hill on 4/20 to smoke weed, was cancelled this year because the organizers couldn't get their act together. (More...)
Mozart to be inducted into the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame
Joining such hard-rocking inductees as Abba, Chet Atkins, Nat King Cole, and Neil Diamond, the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame is proud to induct Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Yet another delicious SPOCKTAIL from the SMRL Beverage Science Labs! Check under the cap for your chance to win thousands of fabulous prizes! (More...)
When you've been up all night sampling other Spocktails and guzzling absinthe, you need a morning pick-me-up with some KICK. Time for a tall glass of Blurry Sharp Meltdown! (More...)
This week: another fine spocktail from the beverage researchers at SMRL! Drink it in peace, because WE DID THE RESEARCH! (More...)
The Deep Dark Underbelly of the Star Wars Myth, or Ramayana Remembered
It's a fact: Star Wars is a blatant plagiarism of an ancient Asian legend, and the long lines of devout Star Wars freaks are really unscrupulous Asian copyright busters. From Indonesia to Thailand to Nepal, videos are available for sale or rent before they're even released in the US and UK due to this nerdy camcorder-clutching bunch. (More...)
One of our star reporters was sent to Comdex by his employer. El Destino reports live from the biggest, geekiest trade show in the world. (More...)
Songs Of Love And Special Things
Well, dear reader, there's no denying it: Spring has sprung. The air is pungent with the fertile aroma of Romance. And you know what goes with Romance, don't you? That's right, Lover, porn. And not just any porn, but the kind you can sing along to. (More...)
