Build Date: Wed Jan 28 18:10:10 2026 UTC
Ah, looks like it's about time to turn human misery into fat piles of cash.
-- S. Dallas, Esq.
Crazy-Ass German Linux Distribution... with GUITAR
1999-06-14 19:31:00
Hey! I always say that S.u.S.E. is the default weird Linux distribution, because it's got GERMAN CRAZINESS built into every CD. But now I'm not sure: MANDRAKE may be the new way to go!
So, check it: Linux Mandrake, right? RIGHT?! Are you with me on this one? This is THE NEW creepy freakazoid nutty ballbuster Linux distribution. Why?
Because CHECK THIS OUT: they are FRENCH. French Linux! Not since the days of crazy ass Kheops Linux have the French had the guts to put out a Linux distro. They even call it "Linux Mandrake," the French way to say "Mandrake Fucking Linux!" Man, you just gotta LOVE THOSE PEOPLE.
Then, OK, number TWO is that they merged with/absorbed BeroLinux, which was a crazy GERMAN distribution. So that's, like, extra-crazy franco-german experience! Wee haw! Big fat French guys bossin around the German freako programmer d00ds. I love it!
But the best part -- the really kick-ass part -- is that everything is optimized with PGCC for the AMD K6. No shit! Sure, they have Pentium optimizations, too, but who cares? Who uses a piece of shit Pentium anymore? AMD K6 is where it's AT. And Mandrake has it! Oh man!
I guess the other cool thing is that they keep pretty up-to-date with the new software like KDE and Gnome. But that's not as cool as the other stuff. Oh, and there's not really a guitar involved, but that would be a good idea, doncha think? Gotta figure out a way to work in guitars somehow.
Anyways, check out LINUX MANDRAKE at the following URL. Order it and put it on your funky cold AMD K6 computer and then you too can say "Beaujolais, Linux Mandrake!"

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