Build Date: Sat Feb 24 09:30:11 2024 UTC

If your 87 year old Aunt Edna all of a sudden started handing out fresh tabs of acid, would you complain about how embarrasing and un-hip Edna is with her rocking chair and Alzheimers n' all, or would you just shut up and enjoy this unexpected bounty...
-- Patient Joab

40,000 Linux boxes on one machine

by Pao Tzu

2000-05-11 15:18:27

IBM is hella down with non-sucky computers.

IBM says they have 40,000 virtual machines on one box!


Shit, this is going to blow Microshaft's ILOVEYOU no PGP having fat pig method of serving applications out of the muddy lake where it inhales its own dying stench in between manual defragmentations of pornographic asf files.

Check it, IBM will make this shit turn back to 1981. Fuck PCs. Fuck WORDSTAR. Goddamn. Computers are not typewriters.

Imagine you're in some big mainframe relay network. You log into your own virtual machine on the mainframe box and initialize your desktop which is halfway in the last sentence you typed yesterday.

Terminal hookups, the ones where you had to fuck with the telephone hook if the modem got fucked up and jam the telephone handset back on the hook before saying fuckit and driving into the office to use a WYSE hookup on the DIRECT CONNECTION.

Printing? Fuck, IBM will hook you up with a representative that will come and set your printer on double-speed for you! Not only that with the HUD mainframe linux relay network you can play PySol on your fucking lunch break WITHOUT having to sweat spitting coffee all over your LCD.

Furthermore with 40,000 computers at 500M byte second you'll be able to have a computer in the bathroom. In the PUBLIC bathrooms like in Holland where you can check you email except it won't be FUCKED UP INTEL shit it will be a direct mainframe Virtual Network Computing AT&T IBM Linux machine hopping with computer porn email attachments ENCODED so that the Singaporian government doesn't reroute access.

IBM Linux mainframes can even HACK on the shitter.

Linux will be on Microsoft like that guy who punched you in your eye and while he was looking through your wallet kicking you in the gut he was yelling ``WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?''

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

T O P   S T O R I E S

Hunter vs Typewriter

C L A S S I C   P I G D O G