Build Date: Fri Dec 8 03:30:19 2023 UTC
Fuck, now I'm drinking at work. This can't be any good, oh no.
-- Head Freezin' Gene
Daddy, Can We Have More Kool Aid?
2000-08-30 09:50:59
When it comes to Beverage Research, we always advise our readers to leave this area to the professionals (specifically, us). Here’s why.
In Florida, Thierry Cassagnol has been charged with endangering his two kids. It seems that Thierry, after reading Pigdog decided to concoct his own Spocktail. He then left the mix in his refrigerator. Later, this fusion was given to his two the munchkins by the babysitter, who thought it was Kool Aid.
Let this be a lesson to all of you.
T O P S T O R I E S
Gary Busey definitely involved in a hit and run accident
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Health and Human Services officials spend a year on pot
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If you've ever wondered what actual bullshit looks like, just check the back side of Lee Meyers' decommissioned police cruiser. Lee chopped the top of the passenger side of the car off so he could take his full-grown Watusi bull, named Howdy Doody, for joy rides around his home town of Neligh, Nebraska. Since the car doesn't have bathroom facilities Howdy Doody just craps all over the back and side of the car whenever he feels the need to let one go. (More...)
Self-righteous assholes block highway to Burning Man
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How much force does it take to pull out nose hair?
Have you ever pulled out a nose hair and felt like part of your brain came with it? Have your eyes watered from the extreme pain? Did you wonder how much force it took? Would you pull out 50 more hairs afterwards, using precise measuring instruments, to determine the answer IN THE NAME OF SCIENCE? (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
So I was walking around the Tenderloin looking for stray twenty-dollar-bills that might have fallen into gutters, and I was thinking, as I often do, about my mother. (More...)
Three Days and 25 Spocktails: A Cautionary Tale
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Report from Spiritual Machines
Arkuat gives you the inside scoop on the "Spiritual Machines" panel and conclave. Wacky excitement ensues! (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)
Last week I had eye surgery and it was certainly one of the least enjoyable episodes of my life. Eye Surgeons like their patients to be conscious enough so that they can move their eyes to the proper position during surgery. (More...)
Skunk School -- Learn Why Not To Keep Skunks As Pets
There is an alarming trend in pet purchasing habits this fall. People inspired by the WWII film, "Life is Beautiful" -- the one with that annoying Italian guy -- are buying descented skunks by the millions. (More...)
