Build Date: Thu Dec 5 22:10:14 2024 UTC

The only questions worth asking today are whether humans are going to have any emotions tomorrow, and what the quality of life will be if the answer is no.
-- Lester Bangs

Fruity Hillbilly

by LiquorPig

2004-08-05 20:14:46

It's that time of year again -- Burning Man Season -- and that means fresh SCIENCE! Here is a new lab experiment for the fruity hillbilly in all of us.

Every year around this time, an elite group of scientists at Spock Mountain Research Labs (world leaders in Beverage Science and Leisure Technology) work madly to prepare the latest research for the public at Black Rock City. The scientists spend literally thousands of man hours researching new technologies and methods.

Most of the experiments turn out to be dead-end pursuits that are never revealed to the public, but a tiny fraction of the research pays off. All summer, the scientists work feverishly to prepare for Burning Man, where the promising experiments will be tested on a population of over 30,000 human test subjects. Here is a rare sneak-preview of an experiment in progress. This is an unfinished recipe, and hence untested. If you try this experiment at home, please exercise extreme caution.

This Beverage Science experiment is best done outdoors, preferrably in a hot, dusty climate. This drink involves all five senses, including hearing, and is best consumed according exactly to the directions.

Fruity Hillbilly

Ingredients

  • 1 1/2 oz. small batch or single barrel bourbon whiskey
  • Raspberries (other berries or coarsely chopped fruit can be substituted)
  • One or more banjos (recorded music can be substituted)
  • 1 other ingredient

Directions

First, choose your other ingredient. Be creative.

Put 2-3 raspberries and your other ingredient in a shot glass. Cover the fruit with bourbon. Listen to (or play) the banjo music while drinking and eating your fruity hillbilly. Enjoy. This recipe also makes great gifts.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

yungstud@pigdog.org

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