Build Date: Fri Oct 17 04:10:13 2025 UTC
Parse does not the above.
-- Doctor Obnox
The Millennium Falcon
1999-11-14 18:55:23
We here in SMRL's Beverage Research Lab realize that there is more to life than just drinking spocktails. It's important to have other activities. One such activity that we wholeheartedly support is dancing six or more hours to Trance music. So we have designed a drink to accommodate this.
We call this drink The Millennium Falcon, because it'll quickly propel you into hyperdrive in no time. It's also easy to make.
The Millennium Falcon
Mix the vodka and Hansen's. Crack open Metabolift capsule and empty into mixture. Drink quickly and prepare to blast off with all the fun of speed, but no annoying psychosis or pesky burnout.
Warning: Do not drink more than two in a six-hour period. Your heart will explode. And no one needs that mess or distraction when trying to dance.
T O P S T O R I E S
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C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Spock Went, Spock Wrote, Spock Kicked Ass
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Report from Spiritual Machines
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The end of summer is near and sirens call of Black Rock City are beginning to summons Pigdoggers from all of the world to Burning Man. Spock Mountain Research Labs (SMRL), the world leader in beverage science and leisure technology will be at our second home for a week at 5:00 and Infant (how fitting) as we enjoy the liberated lifestyle of a temporary community 200 miles from nowhere... (More...)
It’s election night. My wife and I are holed-up in this hotel that my political party has rented out for the evening. Outside, people are being violently beaten for whom they voted for. Is this South Africa? Perhaps we’re in Haiti or some Southern state during the 60’s. Of all the places where this sort of thing happens, it’s mind-boggling that we are in Portland, Maine. (More...)
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