I've been on the road doing comedy for ten years now, so bear with me while I plaster on a fake smile and plow through this shit one more time. -- Bill Hicks
Haha! Man, the MPAA must hire the dumbest thugs in the world -- off the back of the reject truck at the thug meat factory or something. How could they be such dumbclucks, man? Har!
So, longtime Pigdog Journal readers will probably remember the Cascading Style Sheets tool that was released in February
2000. This tool, DeCSS, is used to remove CSS style sheet instructions from
HTML tools. It's proven really useful for people who hate sheets in general
and style in particular.
Anyhow, the tool has been mirrored far and wide on many different Web sites,
including the one linked below. But today I got a message from the site's
owner, Collin:
Thought you might like to know that I received a letter from the MPAA about
hosting your version of DeCSS at my website. In addition, my ISP (which
happens to be my high school) got all up in arms about it, threatened to
take my account away, my website down and dump hot oil all over me. While
I'm sure that once they realize I didn't do anything wrong nothing will
happen, I thought it might amuse you. The fact that the MPAA didn't even
check to see what was being hosted is quite funny in my opinion.
Man! I mean, BEAUJOLAIS to Collin, who's standing up for what's right and
doing the right thing. But what kind of buttheads have they got working at the
MPAA? Cripes! I mean, here's an excerpt of the letter that Collin forwarded:
>>We have received information that the above referenced
Internet site is
providing a circumvention device commonly known as DeCSS. DeCSS is a
software utility that decrypts or unscrambles the contents of DVDs
(consisting of copyrighted motion pictures) or otherwise circumvents the
protection afforded by the Contents Scramble System (CSS) and permits the
copying of the DVD contents and/or any portion thereof. As such, DeCSS is
an unlawful circumvention device within the meaning of the Digital
Millennium Copyright Act, Title 17 United States Code Section
1201(a)(2)(3). Providing or offering DeCSS to the public on your system
or
network violates the provisions of Section 1201(a)(2) [gar gar gar] [...]
We therefore demand that you take appropriate steps to cause the
immediate
removal of DeCSS from the above identified Internet site, along with such
other actions as may be necessary or appropriate to suspend this illegal
activity. [...]
Also pursuant to DMCA, we hereby state, under penalty
of perjury under
the
law of California and under the laws of the United States, that the
information in this notification is accurate and that we are authorized to
act on behalf of the owners of the exclusive rights being infringed as set
forth in this notification.
I can't believe it, man! Not only are they nailing Collin for a CRIME he did
not COMMIT, but they openly say in their letter that they are under penalty of
perjury if they get things wrong. Now, if you were under PENALTY of PERJURY,
wouldn't you take a little time and just make sure you had your facts straight?
What happens now to these creeps? Are they going to do some jail time for
their perjuring ways? Is there a frivolous action lawsuit on the way? Who the
hell knows? All I know is that Collin's had to remove the DeCSS image and link
while his school investigates the problem. HELL, seems like a NO-BRAINER to
me. I'd be billing the MPAA for my costs if those guys came after me. Screw
this shit!
My main question is: how did the MPAA end up getting such LOW GRADE HENCHMEN,
who go around openly perjuring themselves with nary a thought about it? I
thought they were the guys with the MONEY in this fight -- why can't they
afford qualified help?
Way back in February I offered to help any goon working for the MPAA quit
their job as a digital snitch and go straight. Hell, the economy may be in the
shitcan, but even the marginally competent can still get good money in the
tech field. I have to re-iterate the offer, especially considering how
helpless these MPAA hired guns are. They're obviously no good at their current
job, and if they keep it up they might be going to jail. Hell, it sounds like
time for a career change, fellas. Just drop me
a line and I'll try and hook you up with some interviews.
Meanwhile, let's all give the Software Jihad salute to Collin, who's out on
the line keeping it real. Check out his fine Austin Powers Web site, and give
the man some props. Up the Jihad!
