Crazy Freakfest In the Streets for J20

by Mr. Bad

2001-01-17 18:34:01

What a Riot!

d00d! It's that time again -- another protest massive in the HEART of the MACHINE. Welcome in the Second Bush Era with a scream and not a whimper -- hit the streets on J20!

OK, dig: so ever since the big WTO hoo-ha up in Seattle a while ago, every big protest on Earth has to be given a name based on the first letter of the month plus the number of the day of the month. So the protests revolving around the inauguration of George W. Bush are called "J20" by those protest hipsters in the know. Who cares if that's the standards committee for Smalltalk? We need a name and "Big-ass Inauguration Protest" just doesn't have the same revolutionary Newspeak ring.

Oh, but anyways: George W. Bush! Elected to President! And barring global catastrophe he's going to become president on January 20th, with the horse-drawn-carriage and the crowds and the big party and everything. Yipes! Holy fuckbags!

We're headed into another era of high weirdness. For some reason the guy who's in the White House tends to set the tone for the entire nation, and I doubt George W. Bush is going to be an exception. Not that this previous 8 years hasn't be frickin' creepy in and of its own right, but I have a bad feeling about the upcoming Time of Trouble. There's just a reallll bad timewarp juju about this transition, I dunno.

Hell, the fact that the man is riding into the office on the crest of a wave of chaos, chicanery, and plain old dipshitted confusion is bad enough. Truth be told, the election of George Bush is not only a glaring red YOU ARE HERE arrow in the ugly mall map of all that's wrong with democracy in general and American politics in particular, but its really a glaring example of the horrendous come-to-pass thrown upon us by the human condition. How can we know anything? Who decides when those in authority are wrong? How can we count everybody? When can we just round off at the end and say, "Good enough for government work"? Why do I have to even be stuck on this planet with the rest of you morons?

Frankly, it's all entirely unfair, and that's why we're having a protest here. OK, well, that's not entirely why. The fact is that every single lefty cause on the planet is going to be espoused at the J20 protests. Of course, there will be a militant Mumia Abu-Jamal contingent (why isn't that man free yet? I'm sick of hearing about him), a bunch of Iraq people, some folks in support of that island in Puerto Rico that keeps getting bombed, some mainstream libby groups probly, etc. etc. Everybody's gotta beef and they're taking it to the streets, as is absolutely correct and proper.

It looks like we've got two big-ass protests going on for J20. The first and foremost is in DC, and of course it'll get all the attention and be the most humorless and unfun. The better one, I'm sure, will be here in SF, featuring (among other things) a coolio march by the St. Stupid's Parade folks (who are also responsible for hijacking a Nation cover to make this cool poster). It should be a good time, actually -- the Bay Area has righteous indignation in a violent-yet-fun-setting down pat.

I suggest to all Pigdog Readers that you hit the streets on J20 no matter what part of the political spectrum you're on. Protest the inauguration of the borderline-retarded new President, protest the widespread use of GIFs, or protest the encroachment of brown snails onto your tomato plants. Protest the cruel ways of the world, protest the fundamental undecidability of elections, protest the mechanism of protest. Make a noisemaker, make a cool sign. Wear a turtle suit. Get your fundamental scream out, because the bad shit is only just begun.

Check it out yourself

junkyarddog@pigdog.org