Build Date: Sat Apr 20 08:40:06 2024 UTC
Last night I was at Denny's in Emeryville, and security guards wearing big uniforms, leather gloves, batons, and sidearms (45's maybe) seated us!! They weren't just standing around like normal security guards, they were the hosts.
-- Ratsnatcher
The WTO Protests are Decadent and Depraved
1999-12-01 01:49:34
Is it just me, or is it that BOTH the WTO and the chunderheads protesting against the WTO in Seattle are starting to look equally repellent?
Sure, the World Trade Organization is big-time Evil With Capital Letters and is probably doing voodoo on trees and Ammurican jobs even as we speak, BEHIND CLOSED DOORS and whatnot, but some of these protesters look like they would lose an argument with a ball-peen hammer or a variety of other simple household objects.
It's the "Fuck the issues, let's tear shit up" crowd out in force, and, as usual, they're being led by the usual suspects from the gleaming Baghdad by the Bay to the far south.
Like the damned witches, for instance. CNN reports "60 San Francisco-area witches" have made the trek to Seattle for the big marshmallow toast. "We are all connected to the earth and to each other, and we have a responsibility to have a healthy connection," said Marion Doub, one of the witches. She also said a bunch of other goopy, nonsensical Teshspew that isn't worth the effort to quote.
And like what seems to be about 90% of everybody else running amok in downtown Rain Central, she probably has absolutely no clue what she's doing there, except she'll get to chant and wave candles around. For others, the sheer joy of tossing a Molotov cocktail makes the occasion a festive one.
Three cheers for lockstep know-nothingism. Maybe the John Brown Anti-Clan League will show up and address the really important issues here.
T O P S T O R I E S
In 2010 Dr. Cheng-Huai Ruan discovered a way to cause a patient with an abnormal heartbeat to get back into a normal rhythm by sticking a finger up the patient's ass. (More...)
WKRP in Cincinnati aired from 1978 through 1982. Howard Hesseman played Dr. Johnny Fever, a DJ from Los Angeles who was fired from his previous job for saying the word "booger" on the air. In the show Hesseman would do some dialogue, introduce a song, and start the song. You'd hear a few notes, but never the whole song. (More...)
SF Hippies Can't Get Their Act Together
The annual 420 Hippie Hill event in Golden Gate Park, where large crowds of hippies, wannabe hippies, and hippie poseurs drape themselves in tie dye t-shirts and gather on a hill on 4/20 to smoke weed, was cancelled this year because the organizers couldn't get their act together. (More...)
Mozart to be inducted into the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame
Joining such hard-rocking inductees as Abba, Chet Atkins, Nat King Cole, and Neil Diamond, the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame is proud to induct Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. (More...)
Gary Busey definitely involved in a hit and run accident
Gary Busey was definitely involved in a hit-and-run accident, but won't face any charges because he's rich and famous. (More...)
Gary Busey allegedly involved in Malibu hit-and-run
"Sir! You hit my car! I need your information!" the woman yelled at Gary Busey driving a battered Volvo station wagon before he sped off. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Suru and I were at the local supermarket recently when we found ourselves in the booze isle, surrounded by rum. Banana rum, coconut rum, vanilla rum, unfiltered run, Jamaican rum, rum, rum, and more rum. We bought one of each and started experimenting... (More...)
It's winter in Idaho, and Boise personality "Lego-Man" reports on how he celebrated Thanksgiving. "I fed my wife, mother and sister wine slurpies!" (More...)
My dear and close friend, Porn Maven Shannon Mariemont, sent me a titillating message the other day about her new project: the PornOrchestra. Her desire, at most, is to reinvent the porn soundtrack and, at least, to receive a cease-and-desist order like all her cool friends did last year. (More...)
During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)
It was early in May last year when I first heard about Spock Mountain Research Labs. I was working on a story about a Hungarian scientist's new approach to nucleopeptide synthesis when I got a call from my friend Albert. (More...)
