Build Date: Thu May 1 05:30:44 2025 UTC
It's raining out now. I'd go out and run naked except that I'm in Oakland and I'd probably be arrested.
-- The Compulsive Splicer
Write for The Pigdog Journal... or You Suck
1999-01-07 00:07:00
Everyone reveres the Mining Company -- the great internet start-up that bottled SlashDot's formula and sold it wholesale. But things are not always what they seem. New evidence suggests The Mining Company is an evil scam, like sixdegrees.com and the Free Masons.
The Mining Company posted an ad to the List Foundation offering to let aspiring writers "break into" web writing! "Unfortunately, we cannot pay for the articles," their ad explains, "but you will get a byline, bio, and (almost) total editorial control!"
What is this bullshit? You write their web content for free, and they give you....nothing?
Oh, I'm sorry -- you get a by-line and a bio, too. Whoopee! Don't spend it all in one place! Savor that warm glow from your by-line while you shiver unfed in a South of Market flophouse. And when you're out on the streets, be sure to say hi to the bums. They're probably writing for MiningCo.com too!
Attention aspiring writers: Why write for those pussies at MiningCo.com? If you're not going to make any money, you should at least be having some fun! Take your personal essays and your restaurant/club reviews and stick them up your ass. Then compose scatological rants, geeky satirical dialogues, and disturbing blurbs about weird news of the world -- and send them to Pigdog! Who knows? Maybe we'll proclaim you the winner in a yet-to-be-announced William Burroughs sound-alike contest. (Really! Send something that actually sounds like William Burroughs, and we'll proclaim you the winner!)
Unfortunately, WE can't pay for the articles EITHER! But you'll get a byline in pretty blue letters, linked to your name! And how cool is THAT?!
Out: MiningCo. In: Pigdog.
That is all.
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
First in a regular series! The Pigdog Journal Spocktail of the Week features recipes for EXCITING and DELICIOUS potions and tonics for your quaffing pleasure! Gulp down a whole lot TODAY! (More...)
About 14 years ago when I was on a road trip and stopped in Seattle, I was invited to a party. At this party there were these little tiny glasses sitting in a flat-bottomed bowl of ice. Thin cylinders about an inch in diameter and 4 inches tall, with thick glass at the bottom. Into these were poured frozen AKVAVIT... also known as the water of life. (More...)
The IBM Selectric Typewriter Changed My Life
I ran my hands lovingly across her frame, lightly brushing her metallic nipples with my fingers, admiring the shapes and the ways of her curves, the empathetic hum she produced as I had my way with her, the way she made it all seem so effortless and right... she didn't even seem to mind the way I roughly manipulated her knobs and tweaked her casing. She was extremely tolerant, for a typewriter. (More...)
Brother Wayne Lays Down the Truth
Flesh interviews Wayne Kramer of MC5. (More...)
Our team of crack journalists went insane, and made the drive from Concord, California to Concord, New Hasmpshire on Interstate 80. Read the insightful observations of our intrepid travelers made on their journey into the heartland. (More...)
