Build Date: Mon Aug 11 04:00:58 2025 UTC
Liquor is God's holiest gift to us.
-- Joseph S. Barrera III
Ins and Outs for the Year 2001
2000-12-31 19:40:03
Whew! I bet you were worried Mr. Bad wasn't going to give you guidance for WHAT'S HOT and WHAT'S SNOT in the year 2001, weren't you! Hahaha! Oh ye of little faith! Mr. Bad will never, ever let you down. Trust in Mr. Bad to give you lists of futurist predictions and shit! Because that is what Mr. Bad does. He makes lists. That is his job.
| Out | In |
|---|---|
| Boethius | Foucault |
| Fun Saver disposable cameras | ferrets |
| Mork and Mindy lunchboxes | Mork and Mindy sleeping bags |
| MP3 radio stations | Boontling |
| Personal Digital Assistants | Gigantic refridgerator-sized spaceship-running killer AI bots |
| Po Bronson | Lawrence Durrell |
| Mentos | The Devil Dolls |
| R. U. Sirius | edible underwear |
| American Spirits | Natural Blend |
| dot-coms | shit disturbers |
| juggs and hooters | big luscious black butts |
| Draconians | Yeeks |
| cyberporn | racy sidewalk chalk drawings |
| distributed denial of service (DDOS) | distributed denial of freedom (DDOF) |
| The Web | Freenet |
| biscuits and gravy | bed-time stories |
| Captain and Teneille | Just the Captain (No Teneille) |
| MDMA | MDA |
| slashdot.org | kuro5hin |
| Ibiza | quilting |
| Drum and bass | swing dancing |
| Sisqo | Roosevelt Franklin |
| keffiya | razor wire |
| Raquel Darrian | Devon |
| having babies | cloning |
| Jimmy Carter | Subcomadante Marcos |
| "Pirates of Penzance" | "The Mikado" |
| data havens | monoliths |
| hands-free cell phones | OK, I can't keep a straight face about the swing dancing one. Swing dancing is NOT coming back in. EVER. Sorry to mislead you, but it seemed funny at the time. |
| benzine | the right-hand rule |
| XML | Esperanto |
| JSP | LAML |
| sarcasm | harm reduction |
| corndogs | vitamin E lotion |
| .biz | AnarchyNIC |
| Alan Greenspan | Abby Hoffman |
| The 70s | betel nut |
| "Barely Legal" | "Virgins" |
| home fries | fruit cup |
| Newspapers | Messenger pigeons |
| new restaurants | Original Joe's |
| sorghum | quinoa |
| scooters | slutty Republican chicks |
| weapons of Westernesse | Chaotic weapons |
| peer-to-peer | underground |
| Zen buddhism | asian thumbs |
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
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Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
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Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
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The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
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C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Paranoid Strippers & Psychotic Crack Dealers (Tales of Christmas Eve)
Christmas day, for the last 17 or so years has bored me. I find that the real fun and excitement always takes place on Christmas Eve. Every other year, it's the excitement of the metaphorical hunt instead of the kill. Otherwise, it's just plain bad craziness. (More...)
The One I Feel Sorry For Is Joses
We've had a lot of Jesus coverage lately here at the PDJ. But let's face it, we're not exactly cutting-edge in this subject area. Jesus has been making headlines for, oh, I guess it's a couple thousand years now. Jesus is a very strong brand. Jesus has a lot of mindshare. (More...)
Poor Metallica. All they want is to continue to put out the same weak "Heavy Metal" they've been churning out since the "And Justice For All" days? and make gooey wads of cash in the process. The problem is, people aren't buying their bound for the heavy metal scrap heap, over-produced, uninspired, tired crap. And let's face it, their various commercial endorsements won't pay for the lifestyle they've become comfortably accustomed to. Resorting to lawsuits makes perfect sense, when you need spending money. But just one lawsuit isn't going to pay their bills. So, to aid Metallica, I've composed an open letter to the boys in the band, with suggestions as to whom else they might sic their lapdog lawyers on... (More...)
This week: another fine spocktail from the beverage researchers at SMRL! Drink it in peace, because WE DID THE RESEARCH! (More...)
One of our star reporters was sent to Comdex by his employer. El Destino reports live from the biggest, geekiest trade show in the world. (More...)
Clowns Take on God in Mysterious Annual Ceremony
Last Sunday's (the 6th) Grimaldi Service at a small church in East London was a red-letter day for clowns worldwide. About a hundred old-school red-nosed clowns made the sombre trip to darkest Dalston to pay their respects to clowns who died in the last year and to thank God for the gift of laughter in a bizarre ceremony presided over by the eccentric Reverend Clown Roly, resplendent in a garish red lumberjack shirt with oversized gold lapels. (More...)
