Build Date: Wed Sep 9 13:12:53 2026 UTC
if you post one more fucking "airliner-shot-down-by-missle" story, I'll tie you up in a device like Paul Snider tied Dorothy Stratten into, grease you up, and personally wheel you into the Lone Star on a beer bust night.
-- Flesh
Mandrills Create Their Own Web Site!
1999-06-08 20:04:10
Those Goddamned Mandrills are at it again! And this time they've got a WEB SITE!
Everybody knows that mandrills are real dangerous, because 1) they have big blue butts, 2) they scream and jump around, and 3) they throw their poo at you! Man, what a DEADLY COMBINATION that is!
But now, some sick bastardo has taught a bunch of mandrills how to use Linux, and they created their own damn WEB SITE. As far as sites go, it's pretty OK. I mean, HELL, you know what they say about the dancing bear and stuff. They don't even make a big deal about being apes and shit.
From what I can tell, the mandrills' main interests lean towards kracking computer games, spazzing out about Star Track, and watching pro wrestling. Pretty much what you'd expect, right? The crazy part is that they also like to make MANDRILL TECHNO music! They even have an IceCast server so you can listen to live MANDRILL TECHNO performances on the Web, as they make them! IN-FUCKING-CREDIBLE!
Sure, it's not Internet Radio Pigdog, but it's really not half bad. You can't hold mandrills to that high a standard. So definitely take a bag of mandrill treats over to the site and give them much kudos!
T O P S T O R I E S
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Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
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Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
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C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Report from Spiritual Machines
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Brother Wayne Lays Down the Truth
Flesh interviews Wayne Kramer of MC5. (More...)
Robert Helms makes a living volunteering for medical experiments. Though Helms — and almost all guinea pigs — get paid for their participation in medical trials, they are still "volunteers" according to a byzantine legal code. They are compensated for their time, not paid to ingest medicine. He and "guinea pigs" like him have learned the intimate art of taking catheters in their veins, tubes in their intestines, EKG electrodes on their nipples. (More...)
