Build Date: Thu Jun 12 10:20:11 2025 UTC
When it comes to Darwinism, what the hell does fairness have to do with it. Evolution is inherently unfair.
-- Johnnie Royale
Get a Life, Get a Job
1999-05-12 15:10:15
These dumbasses have not only been waiting in line to see Star Wars - Episode One - The Phantom Menace (Sheesh, could George have made that any longer?) for over a month and they still got nearly a week to go. All to watch a two hour movie that will play all fucking summer long. And they got gonads to put their silliness all online for the world to see.
Didn't someone tell them that the movie that plays on May 16th is the exact same one that will play on August 16th. The movie ain't gonna change... they are gonna have all summer to see it again and again and again and ... But NOOOOOO, these apparently under unitized assets of society have enough free time to spend nearly six weeks in line to see it first. Good thing that our country isn't locked in a life and death struggle against the forces of evil... Oh... wait we are, only we got Giant "Warturds" that we heave Ten Hundred Thousand miles, so no one in this country is inconvenienced with the thought of fighting or dying - unlike in the movie they waiting to see.
As Mr. Bad once said... "Welcome to the post-scarcity economy, man." To which I add, "Go home, Now!"
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
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Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
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Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
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Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
The days are getting longer and, as the man says, the nights are getting HOTTER! Lick your finger, touch your ass and go *Tschssh*, cause the damn SUN is out now! And of course that means it's time for a refreshing Spocktail that meets YOUR NEEDS for a delicious booze cooler at affordable prices. (More...)
Patient Joab's scientifick editorial discusses aspect of the space-time-beer continuum never before processed by sub-bush-robot minds!!! Too fabulantastic to contempulate! (More...)
Last week I had eye surgery and it was certainly one of the least enjoyable episodes of my life. Eye Surgeons like their patients to be conscious enough so that they can move their eyes to the proper position during surgery. (More...)
It’s election night. My wife and I are holed-up in this hotel that my political party has rented out for the evening. Outside, people are being violently beaten for whom they voted for. Is this South Africa? Perhaps we’re in Haiti or some Southern state during the 60’s. Of all the places where this sort of thing happens, it’s mind-boggling that we are in Portland, Maine. (More...)
The quest for knowledge never ends at the super top secret Spock Mountain Laboratory, although it is frequently interrupted by beverage breaks. Recently, a team of crack ethnomixologists returned from a dangerous expedition to the frozen expanse of Canada with the much sought recipe for a Spocktail that is destined to replace blunt force head trauma as the major cause of brain damage in the civilized world. (More...)
Still Up For the Party? America's Dance Floors Are Graying
Raving over 30 doesn't have to be embarassing anymore. (More...)
