Build Date: Thu Mar 28 15:00:04 2024 UTC
I'm skeptical of the premise that there is any such thing as a good musical.
-- The Compulsive Splicer
So-called 'Smart Browsing' Sucks
1998-11-09 17:36:00
So, I have to say the dumbest technology I've seen in a while is the "What's Related" doohickey on Netscape Navigator 4.5. If you don't use 4.5, here's the scoop: there's a little button on the address bar that says "What's Related". When you click on it, it pauses a sec, and then it shows you the titles of about 4-5 sites that are somehow "Related" to the site you're looking at.
First off, it's a lame adaptation of a stand-alone Win32 product, Alexa (http://www.alexa.com/), a parasite program that gloms onto your browser and obsessively watches where you go. But whereas Alexa shows you 'related' sites based on other user's browsing habits, AND lets you submit 'related' URLs, Netscape's "What's Related" seems to pull the URLs directly out of its nether orifice.
It's absolutely horrible. It's degenerate 1995 search-engine technology. I think they must have bought the engine from a team of Bulgarian and Israeli virus writers, because it is uniformly useless.
Take, for example, our beloved Pigdog Journal. When I click on "What's Related" from http://www.pigdog.org, here's what I get:
* Digital Journey Themes (http://ziris.syr.edu/themes.html). This is a page of broken images that hasn't been updated since 1994. I don't know whether to take this as a comment on our staying power on the Internet, or on our lackadaisical approach to site update.
* 1002situations (http://fgidec1.tuwien.ac.at/1002situations/) Some crazy Austrian digerati crap. Sample "What is your homeland?" d00ds, by international law, Germans are not allowed to talk about 'homelands', OK?
* ResRocket (http://www.resrocket.com/) Win32 software for musical collaboration on the Internet. In case you haven't noticed, we don't do that.
* Frequently Asked Questions about 0Rez (http://www.cais.net/elgar/0zpxd.htm). Boring Usenet freaky stuff. 'We so freaky!' Gar. I _hope_ we're not 'related' to this bozo.
* 2013 (http://www.2013.com/). This looks like Mondo 2000 in 1991. What up with these people? I see nothing but links and fancy ray-tracing. How are we related? I suspect Quaker State Tapioca Rupture is involved.
So, what's all that shit got to do with _US_? Simple: they're all listed on the Yahoo "Cyberculture" (oh, it pains me to write that) page, So's PDJ. Case solved. Netscape spidered Yahoo and called themselves a Web portal. (http://dir.yahoo.com/Society_and_Culture/Cultures_and_Groups/Cybercu lture/).
Anyways, my point is, "What's Related" blows. Netscape obviously has no idea what it's doing with this thing. They should stick to milking their Start page and leave these distracting buttons off my browser.
T O P S T O R I E S
Mozart to be inducted into the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame
Joining such hard-rocking inductees as Abba, Chet Atkins, Nat King Cole, and Neil Diamond, the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame is proud to induct Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. (More...)
Gary Busey definitely involved in a hit and run accident
Gary Busey was definitely involved in a hit-and-run accident, but won't face any charges because he's rich and famous. (More...)
Gary Busey allegedly involved in Malibu hit-and-run
"Sir! You hit my car! I need your information!" the woman yelled at Gary Busey driving a battered Volvo station wagon before he sped off. (More...)
Health and Human Services officials spend a year on pot
After a yearlong, comprehensive, thorough, complete investigation into the effects of marijuana usage, Health and Human Services (HHS) officials recommended that it be moved from Schedule I of the Controlled Substances Act to Schedule III, meaning that the HHS no longer considers cannabis to be a drug with high abuse potential and no medical value. (More...)
If you've ever wondered what actual bullshit looks like, just check the back side of Lee Meyers' decommissioned police cruiser. Lee chopped the top of the passenger side of the car off so he could take his full-grown Watusi bull, named Howdy Doody, for joy rides around his home town of Neligh, Nebraska. Since the car doesn't have bathroom facilities Howdy Doody just craps all over the back and side of the car whenever he feels the need to let one go. (More...)
Self-righteous assholes block highway to Burning Man
A group of self-righteous assholes converted exactly zero people to their cause by blocking the highway to Burning Man this week. The group, which used a flimsy trailer, some lengths of chain, and a few folding chairs to block the road, put up signs including "Burners of the World Unite," but none of the burners stopped in traffic wanted to unite with them for anything. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Ratsnatcher gets HOT HOT HOT in this classic road tale that looks at the steamy underworld of Bay Area Linux advocacy. Loosen your collar for this one! (More...)
It's that time of year again -- Burning Man Season -- and that means fresh SCIENCE! Here is a new lab experiment for the fruity hillbilly in all of us. (More...)
Body and Soul, a night of fucking in San Francisco
For the benefit of Pigdog readers, I took it upon myself to explore the deep frontiers of human behavior and attend a saucy festival of the flesh. This was no ordinary fete of carnal delights, dearie. (More...)
First there was the Bloody Mary: Vodka, Tomato Juice, Worcestershire sauce, some spices, and celery. We drank it, and it was good. Then any drink with tomato juice got a prefix of "bloody" attached to it. We drank them, and they were mostly bad. Now Pigdog gets back to basics and introduces The Bloody Dog, a drink with REAL BLOOD in it. HUMAN BLOOD. (More...)
The end of summer is near and sirens call of Black Rock City are beginning to summons Pigdoggers from all of the world to Burning Man. Spock Mountain Research Labs (SMRL), the world leader in beverage science and leisure technology will be at our second home for a week at 5:00 and Infant (how fitting) as we enjoy the liberated lifestyle of a temporary community 200 miles from nowhere... (More...)
Canadia Revealed: A Brief Guide to a Large Country
Recently Pigdog has received many letters from readers who are apparently puzzled and upset by our regular coverage of the mysterious nation north of our border, Canadia. (More...)