Build Date: Thu May 1 02:30:40 2025 UTC
You're just trying to smear me by associating me with crazy reptoid conspiracists. You big smearer.
-- RatSnatcher
LEARN FORTH
1999-10-03 14:07:49
dewdz! I finally found a good Forth tutorial on the WEB! Praise be to Jesus!
I'm trying desperately to learn Forth real hard, in order to break my brain the final last bits and become the ultimate Bad Person of the Future. I think I pointed this out before, but it bears repeating: Forth is the horrible drunken rogue elephant of the programming world. Future space dictators will use Forth to program their legions of oppress-o-bots because it will make them EXTRA RUTHLESS and UNPREDICTABLE.
Anyways, learning Forth is hard. Not just because it's CRAZY in a tuneless-piping-of-idiots Lovecraftian way, but also because there AREN'T any good learning references on the Web. Maybe trying to explain Forth drives already unstable programmers over the edge into the realm of madness, where invisible demons drag them through the street and gnaw on their bones. So, like, they can't finish that Forth tutorial page or whatever. I dunno. This is just a theory.
Well, anywho, just when I was about to despair and go back to some prosaic and sane language like Python, I found the pForth Web page on Google. The Web site is GREAT. pForth is an implementation of Forth that is GREAT. (It's public domain, even.) But the most GREAT thing is that there's a FORTH TUTORIAL available.
The tutorial is good and easy and I was able to go through it in a couple of hours. I don't think it teaches you everything you need to know about Forth, but I think it gives you a good enough starting point to be able to teach yourself the rest. At least, I think so.
If doing the tutorial makes Forth too easy and prosaic, try doing it in FRENCH instead. Pretend you're a mad reclusive Quebecois robotics expert with a rocket launcher and a dream. I dunno, maybe it could help.
Rock the house and LEARN FORTH.
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Owner of 6 Medical Marijuana Dispensaries Arrested
Reefer madness or a government fabrication? (More...)
Ratsnatcher gets HOT HOT HOT in this classic road tale that looks at the steamy underworld of Bay Area Linux advocacy. Loosen your collar for this one! (More...)
Spock Went, Spock Wrote, Spock Kicked Ass
Every Labor Day weekend a large portion of the PDJ staff joins 30,000 other freaks at one of the biggest and strangest art festivals in the world - Burning Man - somewhere on the edge of the Black Rock Desert. Our base of operations is always the ultra swank Spock Mountain Research Labs - the World Leaders in Beverage Science and Leisure Technology. This year, we hauled up our computers, printers and a massive digital duplicator, determined to become Black Rock City's third daily newspaper. Even Spock was surprised by our success - news will never be viewed the same on the playa. Read all seven issues of the 2002 Spock Science Monitor for yourself and see why. (More...)
Skunk School -- Learn Why Not To Keep Skunks As Pets
There is an alarming trend in pet purchasing habits this fall. People inspired by the WWII film, "Life is Beautiful" -- the one with that annoying Italian guy -- are buying descented skunks by the millions. (More...)
During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)
It was early in May last year when I first heard about Spock Mountain Research Labs. I was working on a story about a Hungarian scientist's new approach to nucleopeptide synthesis when I got a call from my friend Albert. (More...)
