Build Date: Fri Jun 13 08:32:12 2025 UTC
The only questions worth asking today are whether humans are going to have any emotions tomorrow, and what the quality of life will be if the answer is no.
-- Lester Bangs
Fnord-O-Rama!
1999-09-23 16:40:41
Bombs! Guns! Dope! Coke! Spiders! Lizards! Alligators! Scorpions! A Man That Lives With His Mom! A Garage Full of Lawn Mowers! Oh the horror! Oh the humanity!
OK, so the guy was actually growing pot in his back yard, and the cops did find coke on a mirror, but the rest is just a fnord-fest. The "bombs" turned out to be some sort of flare things made outta model-rocket parts. The "zoo of dangerous animals" that one cop claims was guarding the drugs and stolen goods turns out to be an alligator (I'm guessing about a 10 inch baby?), geckos, two scorpions and a tarantula (which the article mentions "are venomous").
Uh, scorpions and tarantulas are about as poisonous as bees, OK, maybe wasps... I don't even know what to say about the concept of attack geckos.
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
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Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
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Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
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Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
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The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
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C L A S S I C P I G D O G
40 Acres, a Mule, and a Crummy 90-Second Spot on Weekend Update
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Body and Soul, a night of fucking in San Francisco
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The Liquidation of Hobo Junction
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