Build Date: Thu Apr 3 05:40:22 2025 UTC
There must be better things I can spend my time doing...like rampantly masturbating or something.
-- Paul Vortex
No Refund for Dead Subway Rider
1999-06-16 11:54:50
A corpse was found on the New York Subway after the morning rush. Police believe that the ex-rider started his final journey some four or five hours before his fellow New Yorkers realized he was dead.
Not only has the New York Public Transit Agency refused to refund the man his money (and he is a person who could use some extra cash as his he only had 20 cents on him) but our intrepid Pigdog reporters have learned that the Transit Agency is planning on fining him. First for the assistance he required in exiting the subway train and second for riding the train for five hours.
"Look, I know is seems a tad harsh", stated Emily Jackson, a Transit Agency spokesperson, "to fine a dead man. But face it, not only did he ride the subway for five hours on a single fare, but he was in a handicap reserved seat the entire rush hour and this sort of behavior must be punished."
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