Check it out! The definitive Web site for traditional Zoroastrianists! With
lots of crazy Zoroastrian parables and long treatises on various
aspects of Zoroastrianism! Can you BEAT THAT, motherfucker? I thought not.
Zoroastrianism is TOTALLY COOL. OK, actually, I don't know SHIT about
Zoroastrianism, but, HEY, I still think it's cool. And fundamentalist
"traditional" Zoroastrianism is by any account several points cooler.
I don't usually make a point of picking on persons of faith, and Zoroastrians
aren't going to be the first. Zoroastrianism is bitchen, anyways! They have big
FIRE ceremonies, for one thing. AND they have a big Persian guy with a GIGANTIC
BEARD as their big leader d00d. That's cool, too! He has a great hat! And no one
can deny that they have the best soundtrack of any religion ever! Dun... dun...
dun... DUN-DUN! It puts the fear of Ahura-Mazda in your BONES, man.
If you can find a better Web site for TRADITIONAL ZOROASTRIANISM than this one,
I will eat my cyberbilly hat, goggles and all. And don't give me www.zoroaster.com, because that's just a
punk-ass parked domain. Who needs it! That's what I say to zoroaster.com. Screw
Zoroastrianism may be the last religion in the dictionary, but they're FIRST
with me! Go check out this crazy TRADITIONAL ZOROASTRIANISM site right now! And
tell 'em Mr. Bad sent you! They'll LOVE THAT.