You have come a long way from the Bloodthirsty, Beady-eyed news Hawk that you were in days of yore. Maybe you should try reading something besides those goddamn motorcycle magazines -- or one of these days you'll find hair growing in your palms. -- HST
Thefts, car "accidents", inappropriate juvenile touching,
assaults, domestic violence, and DUI's are just a part of
everyday life in Broomfield.
I don't know why I find police blotter pages so facinating, but I do. I
especially love peering in at the steamy underbelly of Broomfield, USA, courtesy
of their local newspaper.
From this week's police blotter:
"A juvenile was issued a summons for inappropriately touching another juvenile
at 5:30 p.m. at The Bay aquatic center, 250 Lamar St." (It's
amazing how a phrase like "Inappropriate touching" can sound so vague and so
dirty at the same time.)
"Five juveniles were issued curfew and destruction of property summonses after
being contacted at 2:15 a.m. damaging lights near Outlook and Summit trails."
(What do you expect them to do after you've taken away all their drugs?)
"A window of a 1996 BMW was discovered broken at 4 p.m. while parked at Sun
Microsystems, 500 Eldorado Blvd." (Doesn't "BMW" stand for "Break My Windows?")
"A flower pot was knocked over between July 7 and 7 a.m. July 8 on Willow Run
Parkway." (Police are rounding up the usual suspects.)
Every week it's the same. Is there no end to the madness?