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Canadian Government Whores

by Dunkin' Idaho

2002-03-21 01:42:41

Canadia claims a separate, oh-so-unique Canadian culture. Then they flop for the RIAA, their legs in the air...

Canadia's a funny country, not funny weird like Floridia, but more funny feckless, like "huh" (or, as they pronounce it, "eh"). It's like a vast expanded chunk of Scotland / Scandanavia plunked down between the US and the Arctic, most of the people huddled close to the US border with nearly 85% of exports to and about 72% of imports from the US (as they admit here; they're almost the United States, except with Nationalized Health Care (translated as "Wait... for years"), a bewildering patience with their minority rabble of French-speaking separatists (Canadia should have driven them all onto small, slow boats headed back to France, I'll say), an equally unfathomable attachment to The Queen of England (what has she done for them lately, anyway?), a history of pacifism (amnesty for Vietnam War draft refugees, that was nice of them), a penchant for quirky politicians, only one funny website, porous US borders that are child's play for Russian mafia and fundamentist Islamic terrorists, and a majority of governmental idiots. Their latest government idiocy is a craven capitulation to RIAA Music Weasels in the form of proposed new Taxes on CD media and player devices, as dictated by the RIAA through their Canadian front proxy "The Canadian Private Copying Collective" (like it's some kind of commune, or something - yeah). This new Canadian law will at least triple the price of every blank CD-R media disk sold within Canadia, and it will also at least double the price of every writable CD media-player sold throughout Canadia.

Despite Canadia's ties to the US, if they want to exercise some independence from the US media monopolies, this would be just the time to acquire some kind of real backbone and just say No! to US media conglomerates' thuggish attempts at oppression of their sovereign country rights to decide for themselves what's Fair Use. Canadia has it's choice to decide.

One might hope Canadia's politicians manage to do the right thing, just this once. Otherwise, they might just as well do the other thing, and apply for US statehoods. After all - it's not like they'll have to adjust about sucking up to the RIAA.

Dunkin' Idaho regrets having had to thrash his ancestral home like this (his grandparents were all Canadians, bless their souls), but right is right, media companies' oppression is wrong, and clueless political idiots must be exposed.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

quintuplet@pigdog.org

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