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Canadian Authorities Cracking Down on Fish Molestation

by Tjames Madison

1999-05-21 16:42:55

Reacting swiftly to the current Canuck rage for torturing and humiliating river-dwelling fish, Canadian officials have charged an American TV fishing show host with what is believed to be the first ever case of "Fish Molestation" encountered on the North American continent.

Larry Dahlberg, host of ESPN's "The Hunt for Big Fish," was recently fly-fishing in British Columbia while being filmed by his television crew. An eagle-eyed Canadian Department of Fisheries and Oceans noticed Dahlberg playing a bit roughly with the Steelhead on the end of his line, and informed the startled TV host and his Canadian guide Pat Wilson that he was being charged with "unsportsmanlike conduct." More specifically, the Canadian official charged Dahlberg with violation of a British Columbian fishing code which states "No person shall molest or injure fish."

"What Larry was charged with, molesting a fish, is very subjective. Larry didn't do anything wrong!" Wilson told a reporter.

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

iambic@pigdog.org

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