Build Date: Fri Sep 19 07:00:22 2025 UTC
The fear was most excellent, but the loathing could use some improvement.
-- Head Freezin' Gene
Killer Bees Attack Texas!
1999-06-02 01:46:01
The killer bees have made it to Texas! Several residents and assorted domesticated animals in San Antonio were attacked by a huge swarm of angry bees Monday, leaving three unlucky dogs grasping for life.
These Africanized bees are so nasty, according to reports, that they singled out a pit bull for a target. The pit bull was reportedly attacked by thousands of bees while firefighters wearing bulky protective suits attempted to rescue it. One man was so terrified of the killer bees that he almost burnt his house down when he tried to light a fire in his backyard to ward off the terrible bee invasion.
We tried to warn you, Texas, but it was too late. Soon it will be too late ... for EVERYONE! BEHOLD THE KILLER BEES!
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
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Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
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Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
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Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
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Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
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The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
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C L A S S I C P I G D O G
High Availability Guinness Stress Test
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The Deep Dark Underbelly of the Star Wars Myth, or Ramayana Remembered
It's a fact: Star Wars is a blatant plagiarism of an ancient Asian legend, and the long lines of devout Star Wars freaks are really unscrupulous Asian copyright busters. From Indonesia to Thailand to Nepal, videos are available for sale or rent before they're even released in the US and UK due to this nerdy camcorder-clutching bunch. (More...)
Eavesdropping on Geeks: 'Star Trek: Discovery' vs 'The Orville'
If you broke into Pigdog's top sekrit headquarters, spying on their mysterious mix of weird science and old-skool geekiness, you'd overhear this conversation: (More...)
An innocent trip to the Central Market resulted in a severe attack of arachnophobia (and a meal) when a depraved street kid set her vicious pet spider on an unsuspecting shopper. (More...)
A Treatise Prepared for the Gallup Organization on the Symbolism of the Scarab
Well dahlings, the response to my new tarot column has been quite overwhelming. I got three whole pieces of mail requesting my arcane insight. One asked why blogs suck so much, and one was a completely incomprehensible tale of bears shitting random numbers in the woods — I am fairly certain it was a cryptographic allegory. Howsomever, only ONE of the inquiries was accompanied by a crisp ten-dollar bill, and so it's the Gallup Organization that will this week reap the benefit of my wicked pack of cards. (More...)
The Liquidation of Hobo Junction
Albany, CA's homeless hooverville by the Bay, "Hobo Junction," is going to be torn down by The Man. Entrances are already being blocked off, and it's now difficult and dangerous to get there. Worse, these obstacles are making it hard to get to the nearby HORSE TRACK on foot. Local historian, Pao Tzu, has an overview of situation. (More...)
