Build Date: Tue Jun 2 01:50:11 2026 UTC
Fuck, now I'm drinking at work. This can't be any good, oh no.
-- Head Freezin' Gene
Air Marshals Act To Reduce Medicare Costs
2005-12-08 07:57:44
Reducing the Medicare rolls one nut at a time.
On December 7th federal air marshals shot and killed a passenger at Miami International Airport when he claimed to have a bomb in his backpack and then ran away. While I'm sure the officers in question were thinking, "Hell, this is about as clear cut a reason to shoot someone in the back as I'm ever likely to have," there were a few factors that might reasonably have suggested a less lethal course of action.
First among these would probably be the presence of the passenger's wife, screaming that the "bomber" was mentally ill and off his meds. Second, it seems just a tad unlikely that an actual bomber would run from an airplane densely packed with potential victims rather than just exploding his bomb where he stood. While I understand these things can happen quickly, and law enforcement officers are forced to make snap decisions, I must admit that the circumstances were questionably compelling with regard to the use of deadly force -- especially given that the passenger had already passed through security.
But then I realized that it happened in Florida, a state that prides itself on being at the forefront of the battle to reign in Big Government. With this in mind, an possible explanation presents itself. Perhaps in addition to being trained to recognize passengers fitting the profile of a terrorist, marshals based in Florida have been trained to recognize passengers fitting the profile of the chronically ill or disabled. For the cost of a couple of bullets, the marshals could save US taxpayers hundreds of thousands or potentially millions of dollars over the course of time the passenger would otherwise have lived.
In any case, the NYT has an article about it. Check it out and draw your own conclusions.
T O P S T O R I E S
America's National Recording Registry Inducts Culturally Significant Artist - Weezer!
America's Library of Congress calls them "defining sounds of history and culture" and "audio treasures worthy of preservation for all time based on their cultural, historical or aesthetic importance in the nation’s recorded sound heritage." Ladies and gentlemen, I give you... Weezer! (More...)
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
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Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
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Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
Still Up For the Party? America's Dance Floors Are Graying
Raving over 30 doesn't have to be embarassing anymore. (More...)
My dear and close friend, Porn Maven Shannon Mariemont, sent me a titillating message the other day about her new project: the PornOrchestra. Her desire, at most, is to reinvent the porn soundtrack and, at least, to receive a cease-and-desist order like all her cool friends did last year. (More...)
Poor Metallica. All they want is to continue to put out the same weak "Heavy Metal" they've been churning out since the "And Justice For All" days? and make gooey wads of cash in the process. The problem is, people aren't buying their bound for the heavy metal scrap heap, over-produced, uninspired, tired crap. And let's face it, their various commercial endorsements won't pay for the lifestyle they've become comfortably accustomed to. Resorting to lawsuits makes perfect sense, when you need spending money. But just one lawsuit isn't going to pay their bills. So, to aid Metallica, I've composed an open letter to the boys in the band, with suggestions as to whom else they might sic their lapdog lawyers on... (More...)
This week: another fine spocktail from the beverage researchers at SMRL! Drink it in peace, because WE DID THE RESEARCH! (More...)
The Deep Dark Underbelly of the Star Wars Myth, or Ramayana Remembered
It's a fact: Star Wars is a blatant plagiarism of an ancient Asian legend, and the long lines of devout Star Wars freaks are really unscrupulous Asian copyright busters. From Indonesia to Thailand to Nepal, videos are available for sale or rent before they're even released in the US and UK due to this nerdy camcorder-clutching bunch. (More...)
We here in SMRL's Beverage Research Lab realize that there is more to life than just drinking spocktails. It's important to have other activities. One such activity that we wholeheartedly support is dancing six or more hours to Trance music. So we have designed a drink to accommodate this. (More...)
