Build Date: Sun Dec 14 11:30:30 2025 UTC
The day is my enemy. The night is my friend.
-- Ella Fitzgerald
My Big Fat Obnoxious President
2004-02-04 12:56:55
Fox presents the ultimate, ultimate practical joke with their latest and greatest brainchild-- MY BIG FAT OBNOXIOUS PRESIDENT
Let's see: Offensive behavior? Check. Gutting the Constitution? Check. Zany foreign policy decisions? Wailing and gnashing of teeth? Check. Obnoxious people? Check. That can mean only one thing: it's time for Fox's newest reality show!
The six hundred episode program, whose high-level concept can probably best be described as "What If Joe Schmo Got Elected to Run a Big, Important, Dangerous Country?", features what FOX terms "the ultimate practical joke" being sprung on an unsuspecting would-be reality show contestant nation.
The contestant, the American Public who believe they are participating in a reality show in which they and their fake fellow contestant "president" must convince the other nations of the world that they "elected" an underachieving frat-boy to lead the world's most powerful and dangerous nation. If they can convince everyone of the legitimacy of their 'president's' regime and make it through the 4 year term of office, the foreign diplomat visits, the international state visits, the press conferences without anyone discovering the truth, they win $1,000,000.
The catch is that unbeknownst to the American Public, "Bush," the other reality contestant who is pretending to be their president, is actually a paid actor, as are all his policy advisors. And the big fat obnoxious "Leader of the Free World" and his fellow actors will test the limits of America's and friends and allies with their shocking behavior.
The show is scheduled to wrap up in the autumn of 2004, but Fox executives, bolstered by the unprecedented success of "President", are already planning and even more audacious successor...MY BIG FAT OBNOXIOUS EMPIRE
T O P S T O R I E S
The Crossroads are real and The Blues is a place; The enduring myth of Robert Johnson (More...)
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
40 Acres, a Mule, and a Crummy 90-Second Spot on Weekend Update
Consider the plight of the Black Man. The Black Man on "Saturday Night Live," I mean. Has there ever been a more pathetic thing than a token unredeemed for 28 years? Where is the NAACP when you really need them? (More...)
Ah, it's that special time of year again. Chestnuts roasting on an open fire, Jack Frost nipping at your nose, crowded, dangerous streets filled with maniac shoppers rushing to the mall to buy Pokemon action figures, and getting hammered at the Xmas party and insulting the boss's hair weave. That's right: it's time to drink heavily and wait out life's little nagging miseries, holiday variety. Pigdog is here to help. (More...)
Tastes like key lime pie, gets you hammered like nobody's business: Introducing the Key Lime Spocktail! (More...)
During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)
This week: another fine spocktail from the beverage researchers at SMRL! Drink it in peace, because WE DID THE RESEARCH! (More...)
