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"Squeal like a pig." Just saying the line conjures up images of Hillbillies and Ned Beatty's sweaty pink face. It's a powerful image, jammed into the American psyche like a fat Hillbilly cock in a tiny city-dweller's anus. The image will just not go away, no matter how hard you try.
-- enigma

My Big Fat Obnoxious President

by Lenny Tuberose

2004-02-04 12:56:55

Fox presents the ultimate, ultimate practical joke with their latest and greatest brainchild-- MY BIG FAT OBNOXIOUS PRESIDENT

Let's see: Offensive behavior? Check. Gutting the Constitution? Check. Zany foreign policy decisions? Wailing and gnashing of teeth? Check. Obnoxious people? Check. That can mean only one thing: it's time for Fox's newest reality show!

The six hundred episode program, whose high-level concept can probably best be described as "What If Joe Schmo Got Elected to Run a Big, Important, Dangerous Country?", features what FOX terms "the ultimate practical joke" being sprung on an unsuspecting would-be reality show contestant nation.

The contestant, the American Public who believe they are participating in a reality show in which they and their fake fellow contestant "president" must convince the other nations of the world that they "elected" an underachieving frat-boy to lead the world's most powerful and dangerous nation. If they can convince everyone of the legitimacy of their 'president's' regime and make it through the 4 year term of office, the foreign diplomat visits, the international state visits, the press conferences without anyone discovering the truth, they win $1,000,000.

The catch is that unbeknownst to the American Public, "Bush," the other reality contestant who is pretending to be their president, is actually a paid actor, as are all his policy advisors. And the big fat obnoxious "Leader of the Free World" and his fellow actors will test the limits of America's and friends and allies with their shocking behavior.

The show is scheduled to wrap up in the autumn of 2004, but Fox executives, bolstered by the unprecedented success of "President", are already planning and even more audacious successor...MY BIG FAT OBNOXIOUS EMPIRE

Over.  End of Story.  Go home now.

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