Build Date: Mon Oct 13 18:30:18 2025 UTC
It seems I've fallen into a pit of booze and can't get up
-- Johnnie Royale
Dkr. Armand Geddyn
Dkr. Geddyn is presently encamped in Austin, where he spends most of his time wooing the lady bartenders by grossly overtipping and slurring together proclamations of love and bizarre death threats.
Pigdog Journal Articles
2005-02-15
Turns out, posting insider information about your employer lead to your termination. Especially if you've only worked there for less than a month. Duh.
2005-02-10
So, you're lighting some candles (and maybe a fattie) for your niece's second birthday, when all of a sudden you are instantly transported into the last ten minutes of True Romance. Only it's way less fun, because, well, your kids are about to get a cap busted in their baby asses and you don't have Christian Slater there to be So Cool and save the day.
2004-02-13
Operating system source code responsible for running millions of computers on the Internet is now exposed to widespread scrutiny, thanks to the notorious hacker web site, Kernel.org.
2003-08-17
Microsoft Knowledge Base article 826369 describes a free tool from Redmond that enables criminals, terrorists, and hackers to quickly identify 0wnable computers around the world.
2003-01-07
"DVD Jon" Johansen was acquitted Tuesday of all charges brought against him for his authorship of the widely-publicized DeCSS code (not here), which enables Linux users to view legally purchased DVD content on their computers.
2002-07-26
Stephen Puffer, aka the not-so-notorious "Dr SuSE," was indicted by a federal grand jury on two counts of hacking a county district clerk's new wireless network. However, the real story may be one of petty office politics, personal vendettas, and chronic paranoia.
2002-05-23
Cyber-criminal Bernhard Warner dealt a serious blow to Sony's hi-tech copy protection technology this week with the release of his fiendishly clever paper, "Copy-Pr00f CDz Cr4cked w1th 99-Cent M4rk3r Pen!!!1!!1111!"
2002-02-02
PAKISTAWNY, AFGHANISTAN -- The world's most wanted terrorist, Pakistawny Osama, emerged from his burrow Saturday and saw his shadow, indicating Afghanistan will see six more weeks of bombing.
2002-01-11
Lately, it seems that Jerk City has taken on a darker aspect. Oh, there's still plenty of boners, pricks, dongs, and dicks, but more often, there seems to be a decidedly homicidal undercurrent swelling in the daily Net comic.
2001-06-27
In response to the geek media backlash, Microsoft seems to be backpedaling from its Smart Tag blitzkrieg of the Innurnet -- site maintainers can insert a meta tag at the top of their HTML to opt out.
2001-03-13
As a clueful systems administrator, part of my job is to keep the 3v1l hax0rs out of my network. In fact, that's the reason why I got this job in the first place -- everyone knows computer security is dead sexy. The chicks fall all over you.
Offsite links shared by the author
2005-02-17
Your kid might be a k1dd1e if...
2004-12-09
2004-03-03
What's next? A ghostly image of the Virgin Mary on Paris Hilton's poon?
2002-06-22
TMBG Dial-a-song of yesteryear, reincarnated today as a kooky Flash app. Boojoo.
2001-07-15
T O P S T O R I E S
California Glory Hole attracts huge crowds
A glory hole at Napa's Lake Berryessa is drawing huge crowds. According to Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency, the glory hole hasn't been active since 2019, and only restarted operations on Feb 4. (More...)
Republican State Senator busted after soliciting a teenage girl
Republican State Senator Justin Eichorn of Minnesota was arrested for soliciting a teen girl on Monday just hours after he introduced a bill proposing "Trump derangement syndrome" (TDS) as a form of mental illness. (More...)
Parents claim measles is not that bad after having only one child die
The parents of a Texas girl who died from the measles are defending their decision not to vaccinate their daughter. "She says they would still say 'Don't do the shots,'" an unidentified translator for the parents said. "They think it’s not as bad as the media is making it out to be." (More...)
Delusional rich man tries to fire town staff
"I'm mayor now" said write-in mayoral candidate and founder of Pirate’s Booty Snacks Robert Ehrlich after losing the election for Mayor of Sea Cliff, NY. Then he tried to take over the Village Hall and fire everyone. (More...)
Musk claims Xitter security is staffed by idiots
Earlier this month Xitter experienced a massive outage. In an interview, Musk told Fox Business that he believes the attack came from "IP addresses originating in the Ukraine area." (More...)
The Future Ain't What It Used To Be
Ideas have taken horrifying shape and rooted into our modern reality. (More...)
C L A S S I C P I G D O G
During a magnificent sunny day in a fast receding autumn, the Spock Science Monitor reporters once again blew the playa dust off of their computers and covered the 2002 Burning Man Decompression – held every year just east of Portola Hill in beautiful San Francisco. Both an afternoon and evening issues were released to the unsuspecting crowd of freaks attempting to in some small way experience the euphoria of the playa – if but for a brief afternoon far from the desolation of Northern Nevada. (More...)
We here in SMRL's Beverage Research Lab realize that there is more to life than just drinking spocktails. It's important to have other activities. One such activity that we wholeheartedly support is dancing six or more hours to Trance music. So we have designed a drink to accommodate this. (More...)
Johnnie Royale's Guide to Wakes
Wakes can present problems for Bad People of the Future. (If you don't know what a BPotF is, you need to read more of the PDJ.) Sure, your friend is gone and you miss him and that really sucks; it does, I know. But all Bad People of the Future are gonna die, and they have all accepted that fact. They do deserve, however, to have one final kickass party to celebrate all the bad things they've done in the past, present and future. And you, as a friend, have to make sure that their desire for a final send off is well executed (sorry for the pun). That's just the way of BPotFdom. (More...)
What do Computers and Skateboards have in Common?
They both sprang from the mind of John Mauchly that's what. (More...)
Report from Spiritual Machines
Arkuat gives you the inside scoop on the "Spiritual Machines" panel and conclave. Wacky excitement ensues! (More...)
My dear and close friend, Porn Maven Shannon Mariemont, sent me a titillating message the other day about her new project: the PornOrchestra. Her desire, at most, is to reinvent the porn soundtrack and, at least, to receive a cease-and-desist order like all her cool friends did last year. (More...)
